Whatever you would like to do for humanity in order to HELP (improve), that "slap" had alot of attitude in it because your cause is getting the better of you whether you realiize it or not (just like The Zealots had a cause that mislead and distracted them from true devotion). The reference to the Pharisees was not a cultural or racial one, it was that their piety (devotion) was based on personal intentions (our mind works the way we want it to) and the ulterior motive of building their own empire. John The Baptist called them a "Brood of Vipers" because they were satisfied with ONLY what they were taught and taught each other much the same (in a similar fashion) as the traditional institutional teachings of many church organizations today (Matthew 3:7, Luke 3:7). Your whole first paragraph is exactly what The Pharisees did. Their devotion was subjective and they didn't want to disturb what they were comfortable with because their empire was fragile.
There are some foods that I never got to LIKE because of their taste, but I don't HATE them (life is too short for that, it wouldn't serve any useful purpose, and it would prevent peace of mind). It's the same with people, if they decide to make disagreement come between us, I simply (passively) avoid them (not aggressively resent, ridicule, offend, or attack). Not obsessing about it also gives me peace of mind (poetic justice, "what goes around, comes around").
You argue that you feel FORCED (I'm sorry that you feel that way, but we thought you agreed to simply participate in discussion, this is not an indoctrination forum), but the mere nature of 'debate' (a less formal word would be DISCUSSION) means that disagreement and alternate points of view will be expressed. Nobody has to agree on this forum, there is a common topic of discussion and it is meant for participants of a certain category,...Christians (hence the name "CHRISTIAN-ity Debate", as opposed to "exact copy of each other Debate") . The FORCEful arguementation you are in the habit of is the reason you feel pressured and forced, in other words, it is not our fault that you feel forced (what goes around, comes around, the law of reciprocity, "...for whatever a man sows, that also will he reap" Galatians 6:7).
Nobody was put here on earth for you to dissect, analyze and criticize, that is agressive (unecessarily assertive) behavior, not passive discussion.