Re: Sibling molestation

One day when my two boys were taking a bath, I walked in and found the oldest son orally stimulating the younger son, at that time they were 5 and 7. I was completely taken off guard, but I manage to keep my composure, made them get out of the tub after washing up, and then had a long talk with them both.

First I wanted to know where they had learned it from, had it been a friend, etc. My older son said an older boy at school, had followed him home and made him participate in the activity with him.

I set some boundaries, no baths together, no walking around with out under wear, etc.

Then we talked about sex, what was right and wholesome, what wasn't. I let them know they could come and talk to me about anything, they may have heard or seen, and that their bodies were their own, no one had the right to touch them, and they did not have the right to touch anyone else.

I did not tell them they were bad, or express any disgust toward them, it was the best thing I could have done, as over the years
they came to me with all kinds of sexual questions, which could have just as easily been answered by one of their friends, but without the knowledge and bibical answers I provided them with.

Even so there were times as my older son grew that he acted in- appropriately, and I firmly let him know as did his younger brother and sister, that it wasn't acceptable behaviour. We also
let him know we loved him.

Many of my children's friends expressed the desire to talk openly with their parents, but found no avenue open to them. They were afraid of what the parents would do or think and so they kept hidden things that had happened to them rather then make them self subject to their parents wrath or ridicule.

Hope this might help.
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