Re: Guilt, sin and shame

Well, thanks 20113... ;-)

I am a realist. I try to see all sides and I strive to live in the solution rather than in the problem.

Rather than pointing and saying bad child or pointing and saying bad parent, I would simply take stock of the issues (without pre judging) and come to an understanding between everyone. It is amazing what happens when people (adults AND children) can voice their feelings and air their problems and differences with love and mutual respect.

I believe spiritual evolution is gained through learning the lessons life offers, and sometimes the events in our lives force spiritual growth on us (....and if we don't deal our issues, they can fester like an albatross around our necks)

I get the feeling that unfortunately, this 'event' with this family may remain a blot on all their relationships, which is too bad. By handling this in a pessimistic way, by attaching guilt and shame to what they evidently define as deviant sexual behavior in their son, they have already labeled their kid a pervert. (They are desperately looking for counciling for his illness, and won't even let the kid in the same room with his sister) This 13 year old may become completely alienated, end up with repressed sexuality, and actually begin to develop those negative behaviors that these people fear so much.

Children are a reflection of the way you interact with them. If you always berate a child, the child will lose it's self esteem. If you treat your kid like a pervert, (even unconsciously), he may actually end up as one...

I wish these people well. However, I get the feeling that their preconceived ideas of an idealistic 'purity and innocence' in children is not realistic. If this clouds their judgment and causes them to react in a way that will do more damage than good, it would be a pity.

;0)

Wiz







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