Re: Sibling molestation

I HAVE read ALL the messages from everyone and I ONLY agree with those who are telling you that you are blowing this thing WAY out of proportion!
In this world today, it does not matter how much church or ‘right’ teaching we give our children, they are going to be curious and the world IS going to get to them, like it or not.

If I had no children at all, I would keep my mouth shut on this subject, for what can a person with no children POSSIBILY know about raising boys?
I have 4 grown sons, and three young grandsons.
We are Christians that participated in our local very ‘puritan’ beliefs.
Boys WILL be boys and what has happened in your family is no disgrace at all, it is only a matter of a blooming young man, who YES, knows right from wrong, but who’s curiosity got the better of him.
Now PLEASE tell me why in the world would you subject him, your daughter and yourselves to reporting such a minor incident to the police?
Come on, he touch NOTHING and wouldn’t let her touch him!
This should be handled with LOVE and understanding.
Sure, talk to your minister, which is what they are there for.
But to take a matter as innocent as this is to the authorities is only asking for BIG trouble.

Come on, you are his mother, you know him…he is a good boy right?
Then give the kid a break by not making him feel ‘dirty’ or ‘bad’ or worse ‘perverted’.
These feelings can influence him the rest of his life, even perhaps turning him into someone he is not!

I am a middle-aged grandma, and honey, believe me when I tell you that if people would be honest, and especially men, you’d see that boys coming into their sexuality are stimulated easily and don’t know really what to do with it all and MOST have experimented.

With our sons, we were open and honest about all of it, and our two daughters also.
I am happy to report that although we had a couple of ‘naughty’ incidents around this age with our sons (and daughters, but they were older), each has matured into lovely young adults living happy heterosexual lives and raising families whose young sons have already been introduced to ‘sex’ by other playmates (which they no longer play with).
It is going to happen, but just relax and KNOW that the character building you have spent years investing in him, will pay off.
There is so much more I could tell you and reading a book or two is a good idea, talking to your minister is another one.
Bad idea to make your son feel like he is ‘sick’ or to bring in the ‘authorities’!

PLEASE as soon as possible let this young man know he is ok...not right for what he did, but NORMAL.
And you must believe this is true, for it is.

There is NONE perfect in this world.

Hope this helps,
Grandma
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