They were interested in social status and fitting in. Adults or not they acted like teens! I'm still on the edge for the tithing. Does that mea wages, or time? Hmm? I guess I'll have to keep pondering it. FOr me and my hubby out tithing has shown good rewards. We tithe and then get better business. We don't tithe and don't get much business. But I am guessing that it is different for different people. Perhaps the pain you have experienced was enough. Like I've said before, the God I believe in understands. You aren't questioning without reason. And you did try, albet without success. The point is that you still try to live a decent life with kindness towards others. Perhaps your answer to your prayers was that you needed out of that church. It doesn't sound like it was a good place to be. "Good intentions" that harm are still harmful, regardless of how they were meant. If you don't mind, for what did you read the bible for? Knowledge? healing? answers to questions? all of the above? I read the bible when it strikes me, which can very in timing. I read what takes my interest. Sometimes I just read as a security blanket. But I also know that just reading won't do anything, my mom does that! I read for a specific purpose and then try to see if what I read can lead me to see what I need to change, sort of like a map. But then I also read for the pleasure of it, some of the old testament tales are as good as any modern book! (I like Ruth for that reason) It strikes me that if ever a person could have been lead wrong in everything, it might have been you. I'm glad you aren't among those people any more. You deserve better then you recieved there!!