Oh lord..

I am also an artist (a painter and I do some graphic design stuff too). My paintings are my most treasured possessions..they ARE my soul on canvas...they are like my children in a way...if anyone ever destroyed them..I cannot even imagine my reaction..Id probably be so distraught Id either harm them or myself. Im so sorry you had to go through that. :*( It makes me cry thinking about it.
This particular boyfriend had asked for one of my paintings as a gift and I hesitated to give him one (I only GIVE them away to VERY special people who have been in my life for years and are very trusted)..I was unsure what would happen to us and I was afraid if I pissed him off he might destroy it. I dont really know if he would or not...but he was certainly not painting worthy lol..
You posts (and all of them) have given me a lot of hope. Im going to start working out again and get confident. Im trying to plan fun things to do to help me heal (go out with friends, take a nice long day trip to the mountains by myself, maybe take a yoga class). Im extremely angry and extremely hurt still. I dont want to let him make me a hateful person.