Re: I left him today

It is an act...or even if he feels like that now, he'll miss the fix that you gave him.


My ex used to hit me on top of the head because it didn't show any bruises, but then again sometimes he just hauled off and hit me (fractured my jaw once). He was really into pushing. I got pushed all the time, and pushed hard. And psychologically? Just a few tidbits...being told I was stupid, ugly, worthless, unloveable....I'm sure we've all been there. I'm an artist and one night he destroyed years and years of drawings...tore them up right in front of me into tiny pieces. He was the devil incarnate. He left me for another woman who promptly dumped him when he became unattached (hee hee).

About 8 mos later, I was looking good and feeling even better. You better believe he wanted me back. So a well meaning friend (someone I found out he was sleeping with while we were married) got us together for dinner at a mexican restaurant. After a bit too much tequila he told me how much he loved me and missed me. It made me sick! I went outside the front of the restaurant (a big front window where all diners could see) and while he came at me, arms open smiling, I proceeded to projectile vomit all over him. What a sight that must have been!

My vomiting on him was more than physical. All of a sudden I realized that the thought of being with him made me physically ill. My anger was palatable. For years after that I had nightmares that I woke up still married to him.

You will get there too. The first time you feel that sense of relief and freedom will be just the beginning. You will also get really really angry. You must take this anger and use it to your advantage. Exercise, and I'm not kidding. Get you body in shape and your mind will follow. Pretty soon you will feel like nothing can stop you. You my dear will be a force to be reckoned with. It's such a high and it's just around the corner for you. I GUARANTEE that this will happen for you.

He's remarried now to a woman that was formerly married to an abuser. The jerk actually told me that himself...can you imagine, like he was in total denial about what he did to me? Me? I'm married to the most gentle wonderful respectful man in the world...for 25 years now. I tell this man every day how much I appreciate him because I was married to the most vile, evil human being.....

You have gotten out of it alive. Yay for you!! Welcome to the club.

Molly