have you had her tested for oppositional defiant disorder? I am dealing with a 13 year old with antisocial personality. He is a lying, manipulative, con man, and his father is in total denial. If your husband won't attend counseling with you it may be denial. No parent wants to believe something is wrong with their child. It can be overwhelming for you if you feel that you're the only persistent one who is left to discipline your stepdaughter when he should be stepping up. I wish you luck. I'm not sure how much longer I want to put up with the denial in our household. The son sees it as a weakness and just exploits it. Damien.