Re: Am I wrong for ending it?

I am his checkbook because I lost my mother recently and received life insurance money, which went towards the down-payment on our house. So now I have that money, plus my share of the profit from the sale. He had to use his toward his previous debt and to support his habit.

Just a bit more history:
When I met this man who is five years my senior, I had recently graduated with my BBA in Accountancy, and was employed and independent. LIke I said, I had recently lost my mother, and my father had never been a part of my life. The first thing, or almost the first thing he said when we met, was that he wanted me to have his child. Had I known then what I know now, I would have ran the opposite way, but instead I was flattered. Before that I was volunteering with young teen parents and had sworn that I did not want ANY kids of my own.

In about less than a year, I became pregnant with our first child, (VERY CHARMING MAN) at which point we both decided that I should sell MY one bedroom condo which we were both living in to get a two bedroom on both of our names. WE BOTH AGREED that I not work for at least a year, and stay at home with our child (his mother initially suggested it). I agreed because I figured that for at least six months of that year, I would receive unemployment benefits.

When our daughter was six months to be precise, I became pregnant with our son. I cried, and cried, and cried, then did the responsible thing, got online, found the number to an ABORTION Clinic, and made an appointment. HE CRIED and insisted that this would be our last, and also accused me of murdering HIS SON. Of course, I gave in, and had his son. (Didn't think I could get pregnant because I was breast-feeding).

As far as my children's future, I cry every night because of this burden that I have to carry. And they're the reason I feel like I cannot stay in this anymore. It's that everytime he apologises and says he won't do it again, I completely let my guard down, and then when he does another thing that a married man has no business doing, another day or two are stolen from us. I just feel like I can't place my trust in him again. And I refuse to have any joint assets with him again.

We both made sacrifices when we had kids. I never intended to be a stay-at-home-mom, but with two young kids to put through Day-Care in Northern NJ you might as well stay at home, you do the math. I knew that it would not be forever and felt like I was doing my part for the family.

I must say that I never forced this man into anything that he did not want. I think it's the other way around actually. He did everything in his power to steal my independence, and when he had me completely, maybe just grew bored???

I would love to hear any other reasons you may have to excuse or even explain his behavior, because I just don't understand how you could live with someone who seems so happy with his family, and in a matter of six months be just a single mother. And please don't say the strippers and p 0 r n were because I hadn't lost my baby weight, because ironically it was when I would go to the gym that he would gamble online.

Thanks again for your post. Please let me know if you've ever heard this story (no sarcasm intended).
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