I think you have had it! youve sucked it up and put up with abuse and unhappiness for thirteen years and now you are ready to put your energy into you and making your life a happier more fufiling life. I come a religion where marage is a coventant that shouldnt be broken , you husband's harrasment is going againt the covenant you made together with God so you shouldnt feel obligated youve done all you could and I think God is a caring loving understanding God who wants us to be happy . You are worth too much to put up with that any longer There are many men who would treat you like a queen you shouldnt settle for less . Your child are affected by abuse even if you think they dont know about it, they need to see there mom happy