Common sense and abuse

If only "common sense" were enough to battle domestic violence and abuse, the world would be a safer and more emotionally healthy place!  Abuse doesn't just happen overnight, in most cases.  And, victims cannot be stereotyped:  "always" women; "always" underpriviledged; "always" foolish; etc.

Domestic violence and abuse is insidious - it is the systematic breakdown of a person's inner psyche, little by little.  The victim often doesn't realize that abuse prevails in the relationship until, one day, their nose is broken, their fingers are broken, their ribs are broken, and their batterer is somehow placing the blame for their injuries on the victim, "If you were a 'good wife,' you wouldn't question me about our finances," or, "Why do you make me do this to you?  Do you enjoy this?"  By that time, the victim realizes that they have no access to a safety network (trusted friends, relations, siblings), finances, employment, counseling, etc.  Everything that the victim might need is ostensibly provided by the batterer, often in a cruel system of withold/reward.  If the victim complies with the demands of the abuser, the children will be fed.  If the victim dares to defy the abuser, not only will the experience the obvious, but specific needs will be witheld:  medical needs; vehicle use; financial support; spiritual needs (like attending church, synagogue, mosque); friends; relatives; education; etc.

In addition, we are raising up more and more violent human beings on a daily basis.  Have you ever watched any of the music video that's on MTV or other music video networks?  Have you ever actually listened to, or read, the lyrics of the majority of "popular music," lately?  Do you watch such programming as, "Survivor," and other "reality" shows?  In all of the above examples, there are glaring examples of how children are growing up believing that bad choices and behavior will be rewarded with cash, houses, cars, women/men, "bling-bling," etc., and that it is preferable to disdain empathy or accountability for one's own actions or choices.

Yeah, common sense would be a wonderful thing if domestic violence and abuse didn't circumvent such a great idea.