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Lostintheworld, the above response is insightful and factual, on every level. Going onto dating sites will not solve whatever is going on because everyone on those sites is putting forth information that is typically untrue and designed to generate responses. Plentyoffish.com is a repulsive site where sexual "hookups" is the main goal. If you're interested in sex, only, save up your money and head to a well-managed bordello or "escort" agency and keep in mind that it's a business transaction regardless of how you might "feel" about the escort providing the services.
If it is a true relationship that you are seeking, I agree with the poster above and begin working on your Self (Self = soul or inner self). At your age, there is absolutely no reason to feel "lost in the world." This is the best time of your life because you have the energy and freedom to accomplish anything that you put your mind to, including rewiring your thinking, perceptions, beliefs, and self-esteem. Building up your own boundaries and working on whatever issues that you might have will not only benefit you, but attract a partner that will enhance your life, as you will enhance hers.
Speaking from a woman's point of view, it is not the man who is needy, desperate, easily-manipulated, or depressed that catches someone's attention unless she has her own dreadful issues, just as the poster mentioned, above. NOR is it a man who is overbearing, dismissive, abusive, arrogant, or heartless - what most grounded, balanced, and emotionally healthy women seek is a partner and companion who "gets it" about Life, living, and growing older and who realize that rabid sex isn't required as the basis of a healthy and long-lasting relationship. There are also women who seek men out with the belief that they will be provided a specific lifestyle, and they can be avoided by a strong, balanced, and centered man regardless of how attractive the women might be.
Slow down. Take stock of what your immediate vulnerabilities are - neediness; self-esteem; regret; control/anger issues.........whatever. And, just because you haven't "gone off" on someone for years does NOT mean that anger issues aren't present. I didn't argue with the second exspath because I was utterly codependent and I had multiple personal issues. The day that i discovered that he had used my income to finance his extremely deviant lifestyle was the day that all of my disappointments, neglect, dismissals, ridicule, and previous abuse erupted like a sleeping volcano, and I beat the absolute shit out of that man and was arrested and charged with domestic violence (later dismisssed). So......I kept everything down and never spoke my mind, but I was a seething cauldron of anger, fear, and sadness. So............take a close look at your vulnerabilities, start working on them one-at-a-time, and post back in a few months.
But, I would strongly discourage dating sites for anyone, not just you. People on dating sites have an agenda, and it is a rare event that people actually connect on a healthy level. And, healthy relationships are absolutely possible, but they must be earned, not purchased.
Good luck to you.
I feel so sad and forever alone because guys never approach me and I don't understand. I am 5'6 and weigh 125 lbs and I don't think I am ugly. I have a babyface and since I am thin, some people think I look younger than my age (I am 21 but some people think I look 14!). I even one time ended up talking to a guy and he assumed I had a boyfriend, when I said no, he was in shock. He said I am a very beautiful girl and that he sees ugly women with bfs all the time. Strangers (both men and women) tell me I am pretty/beautiful. I don't go to bars or clubs.
However, I am never the girl that is approached for dates or for my number in public anywhere! Unless men only approach ‘easy women’, and I guess I would not be classified as ‘easy.’ One time a guy cold approached and hit on a girl by asking for her number while I was standing right in front of her. This really hurt my esteem because I never get this type of attention. I keep doubting my attractiveness and that there is a possibility that i am not as attractive because no guys ever approach me for dates or to hit on me. They only say I am beautiful in the street and keep walking or when I happen to be in a conversation with a guy, he will tell me I am beautiful. Or, once in a blue moon, I see a guy stare at me openly and it looks like he is about to approach me but he never does it. I once caught a random guy staring at me in a train station and he looked away in embarrassment.
I don't understand why guys aren't interested enough to approach me directly for my number or dates?
Glaze, your letter is so, so very sad. Not because your girlfriend is possibly a cheating flake, but because your life is such a mess!
Yes, how sad. A seemingly sensitive, caring boy, who I'm sure is loaded with potential, and yet, you are unable to write a letter any better than a 7 year old. No punctuations, capitals, paragraphs....HELP!!!!
Look kid, get your nose into your schoolbooks, work hard at improving your intellect, get a vocation or means to improve your lot in life. When you have matured and bettered yourself, then, and only then, find yourself a good woman who matches all your fine qualities. Meanwhile, keep girls as friends, but guard your emotions carefully.
You really do sound like a great kid. Stop shrotchanging yourself. If you don't, your lack of understanding will propel you into anger and bitterness in a few years. Then we will hear from you that women are all b&#*3$
You deserve better in life, but only you can forge your own destiny.
Invincible
15 y
8,264
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