Re: Where should she start from?

really to make a claim about the "base" problem would require a psychologist but I can tell you what picture I get from the information you give. The issues I see involve trust (herself and others), insecurity (which is related to trust) and denial (she keeps her own little world up at all cost). Loosing her outlook on how things are and how she is might be such a thread to her that she will do anything to hold on to it even if it means pretending everything is great. This means you have to be careful because if you tear her little world down, you might be the biggest threat. But she obviously has a very negative self imageand part of it comes from her childhood. So what can you do? If I were you i would seek advice from a proffessional who could help you as to what you can do to make her more secure and to trust in herself and you. Only if she looses these issues with herself can she be relaxed and happy with you. I think you can sort of see that the way she treats you is a mirror of how she is with herself. You are probably the only blessing (and your baby)that this women has - she just cant see it. I hope she doesnt loose you - you seem a great husband and she can be lucky to have someone so concerned about her. But as much as I say you should try to get help for her sake...dont make it an endless battle and go for your own sake when you need to. Good luck with this!