Re: Crashes are now so severe - this is new to me - is this a crash?

Yep I realised a lot of the past month was a benzo withdrawal, I will never touch another benzo as long as I live! Nothing is worth that, candida diet and detox with diazepam, then a benzo detox, no wonder things are this bad. Agree with the nicotine too, I did it cold turkey last year and anxiety went through the roof, hot and cold sweats in the night…this time I though patches would make the transition better, which it has deffinaely done. I figured there would be no right time to do it but I knew I had to stop, so I stopped, in the past three weeks I had a couple of herbal smokes when the crash happens, more as a comforter to stop crying, but nothing more, so hopefully im getting there.


Unfortunately im in such a dark place, stepping back and trying to relax is the worse thing I can do. It brings on the panic massively, which is why im looking at an SSRI to try and ease this a bit, but as I said to snobetty, treating them as a means to an end, not a ‘drop a pill this will fix me’. Plus if they do lift mood eventually, it has to help as I know that this death fixation isnt a morbid 'oh i cant cope with my life', its actually a daily battle because I feel so terrible and I just cant live with it anymore, three years, on my own, ive lost everything and even looking on facebook and seeing friends doing things, and moving on with their lives is heartbreaking. Ive already missed out on so many years, and can I mentally make it through the next few years on my own? I just dont know if i can.

According to my previous hair test I had no toxic metals at all, of course I might not be been detoxing them at the time, so this new one will show up anything. I am going down the NB route but it will be self navigated as I just have no money left at all, other than selling my car, I have three months left to exist, then I really don’t know what im going to do.
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