Re: Wow~ Here's someone who has actually gone through rape....please listen.

Hi!
I am so glad that you were able to see the type of advice that I was trying so hard to say in words. It can be very confusing when dealing with someone who has been traumatized in this way. It takes so much away from a single soul that most people would have no clue the amount of disgrace one is forced to see in one day, minutes even. I am happy that you have made that appointment with her and are keeping it. I don't know how long it will take for her to let you discuss seeing someone else. How long has it been since she went through her ordeal? It makes a big difference here. I noticed that I went through certain phases of dispair, personal neglect, rage, deep depression, and seclusion. I really do feel for her and wish I would've been a part of that profession. So many things that I can personally relate to. Rape, drugs, alcohol, physical abuse, mental abuse, being homeless at a very young age and watching many people die around me. I look at these things now with hope that maybe I can help little by little. If anything.....now it's made me a much stronger person. Wow, and kudo's for her falling asleep in your room. That says a million things right there. If she's falling asleep in our room, she must not be getting enough sleep at home. Nightmares will be haunting her for a long time. I still have them and it's been 18 years. When she comes in don't lead on into it like it's a 100 question game, let her lead if you can.
The instructors all gove you guidance like you said all with their own opinions.
Most of these people go to school for it to learn about the brain, psychology, depression, among other things (I give them credit so please don't get me wrong) but the one lesson the schools fail to leave out is the experience that comes with the trauma that one goes through. No one can even imainge what the world would be like if you went to school to get raped just for the knowledge of instant reality of life. The world is so cold and bitter.

When I got pregnant with my first child, I cried for days. My mother came to visit me and saw that my eyes were swollen along with my face. Of course she asked what's wrong. I told her that I have never been so scared to be a mother. I was terrified that I would be a bad mother. (Listen carefully because this goes with you said,"She feels safe with with me,and I know I need direction) Honey, you are so up to par with this. When you ahve to ask yourself if your good enough for something that you truly believe in and set your mind and heart to. Chances are....you are probably more qualified. She's looking to you as her soul saver. I wouldn't turn her over to someone else unless I personally was not certified in that area. Do you see what I'm saying? To her, you are her hero right now. Getting her other help may just ruin the progress that she has shown. Are you certified to help her all of the way? You have mentioned this in the other portion of the thread, but I forget...it is so long. Anyways, let me know and I'll think things through untl then.

My husband will not except emails from here because for a very long time I was having them sent staright to me and he was really weirded out by them.

May we communicate through this thread? I would love to hear more and know that every little bit of help matters when you least expect it.

Take care,
Kelli Tweet