I realized something is still stopping me too

I noticed I wasnt able to stay in a place of allowing yesterday. I think its because it was V-day and my guy did not call. I thought I was focused on my desires of finding the right One and continue to see him no problem, ignoring all I did not want and only seeing what I want. I just saw him Monday, maybe thats why too. I actually told him before he left that I decided to aloow him to live his life and I would live mine, and if we stay together thats good and if not thats just as good because I believe I will find what I am looking for. I admitted to having put too much pressure on him to change so that we would have the kind of relationship I wanted.

I know, its all about vibration, but it slipped out :-) I felt I needed to tell him to know that I did not agree to see him because I could not resist him, but because I decided to just enjoy what I like and focus on what I want also.

The fact that I said this made me dwell on yesterday whether I should have said this or if it was a mistake.

I dwelled on that he did not wish me happy V-day and that this must mean that he is not the One. I did not like this. Than I kept on thinking if he only did not call because I was resistant and watiting for him to do so and that its not saying anything about where our relationship is headed.

OK, this thread is good for me I see - I need it more than I thought :-)

I have to figure out what is stopping ME. So I guess its good that it was V-day so I figured this out, that I still have to let go of the oars.

I am very surprised Im not dong as good asI think I should be at this point. I should know better about how to apply LOA correctly. Im actualy dissappojnted in me.

I feel like "do as I say not as I do" thinking of some advise I haev given others.

I had such a great start of the say, feeling really great but in the afternoon suddenly I lost it, my thjoughts shifted to my guy and what is...


I will read the other replies later after work when I have time.