the answer "I dont know why I did it" ..could not be more perfect. Please read the book Conversations with God by Neale Donald WAlsch...honestly this will bring closure to the pain you have over your husband having an affair..it will help you to understand WHY he did this ...and you will let go of the anger and mistrust you feel about it..Please check it out at the library...the book is insurmountably life changing...it has changed my life 100% and altered my perception of this archaic antiquated primitive world that we now live in.