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Re: nde
 
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Published: 17 y
 
This is a reply to # 966,677

Re: nde


Oh yeah I mean it, I quit. 40 years is long enough to stay at any one thing. There's plenty of other "things" available to occupy liitle ole me's time. I don't care anymore.

Frustrated? Sure. Pissed-off? Sure. In apathy about the whole thing? You bet.

Who cares? Not this benevolent God you keep talking about.

You don't get it. It's not the bad things in life that have stopped me, it's the good things. Been through hell and back several times - no problem. Conquered it all. Did it all while taking care of other folks problems too. Keeping the love flowing, teaching and applying truth.

Doesn't matter. The lessons learned from all the bad things I went through I already knew. They were taught to me as a kid. Everyone has an innate sense of the way it "should" be.

The "thing" that has brought me down and defeated me is the "love" thing. Supposedly the good side of life. Well, hell with it. Give me some more bad stuff to handle. That, I can do something about, love seems to work on that stuff.

Application of truth has solved every problem I've ever had. Find out what truth you need to handle the situation you're in and apply it. Works like a charm. Every time too.

But not so with love. Nothing you can do about it. If it lands on you, you're lucky but if it doesn't, too damn bad. God laughs at you.

I had it for three years, got it confirmed in war. Haven't had it since (38 years now). Thank you God. I love you too.

So what truth am I supposed to apply to get love in my life? I can pretty much guarautee I've already studied what you're studying. Already applied it, didn't work.

I'm getting bitter and I know it. I DON'T LIKE IT.

Have beat war, supression from the government, terminal disease and many other things, while helping others overcome the same obsticles with truth. But I'll be damned, love has defeated me. I'm haunted by the memory of it and to tell you the truth, life doesn't seem worth living without it.

I hung onto it fevently while going through all the crap, especially "terminal". It literally saved me. To what end? To solve all the problems and then leave me high and dry? Oh sorry buddy, forgot to tell you, love isn't real, dosn't work.

Well it worked to pull me through the war, being terminally ill and a few other things but now that all those things are handled sorry - doesn't work. Its GOT to work, every law I've applied to resolve all the problems is centered in love. Nope, doesn't work for you personally. What kind of crap is that? Oh, love is good if you're in trouble but not good just to have and enjoy with a mate. Plus, I'll show you what it is and then take it away from you.

Nope, I quit. I'll keep on loving others because it's just plain fun. I'll do my job and pull more people out of the muck. I'll love and serve the rest of my life because that's what I choose to do. I'll keep spreading the truth around but to hell with finding true love for myself again. I've wasted enough of my time on that.

My hope is gone, good ridance.
 

 
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