you told us all so much.

I cry for you that you are living in such pain.

I am sorry for that.

I am not a therapist so I am iffy as to what to post.

I really hear how much you want to be loved. It is terrible that this man can not love you. The things he says and does are no part of a loving relationship.
You are doing such harm to yourself trying to please him so he will evolve into a loving husband.

I don't know a simple 1 2 3 plan to let you grasp how great you are and how this relationship has morphed your sense of reality, maybe a good therapist or group to build up your self confidence - it doesn't have to be eating disorder based.
Just a safe place where you can find all the valve and strength in you.
Good luck Tweet