But I think she can be herself from a place of strength. Don't break out the dancing bears, but she/you (not trying to talk about you as if you were not in the room...) can feel good about who she was when she started this thing twenty years ago and conjure up a little of that.
Key to feeling okay w/what you're doing. Explain nothing and do what you would've anyway.
Me, I just feel good when I break out the Ritz crackers and the warming gel...
babycakes
P.S. It sucks and blows simultaneously when you have no idea when someone important is coming...