Re: Zombie Jihad??

This is just too bizarre, but this was taken from
http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/politics/58975 and I googled it and it's all over the net.

A truly weird read--if this report is accurate, what does this say about our govt.?



September 11, 2005

TERRORISTS RECRUITING ZOMBIE ARMY TO INVADE U.S.
Homeland Security Chief Warns Bush

ISLAMIC JIHAD are in Haiti recruiting a zombie army to invade the United States in a nightmarish reprise of 9/11, intelligence sources in Washington have learned.
The plot hatched by the notoriously ruthless Islamic Jihad terror organization is to invade the east coast of Florida with the undead: Troops who don't have to be fed, obey mindlessly, and are extremely hard to kill.

There are no plans yet to ratchet up the terror alert level in the U.S.

But sources say intelligence chatter 'strongly suggests' a 1,200-strong zombie army led by a few suicidal terrorists could invade our shores on or around the second anniversary of the terror attacks on the World Trade Centers and Pentagon, leaving death and horror in their wake.

Prime targets may be nuclear power plants in Miami and Fort Pierce, football stadiums in Tampa and Jacksonville, and NASA operations at Cape Canaveral, the sources say.

"The threat is disturbing and real," Department of Homeland Security Secretary Tom Ridge said in an alarming memo to President George W. Bush dated August 6.

"Finding and arresting human terrorists is hard enough. But now we're looking at the possibility of having to fight a completely different kind of enemy -- one that you can't kill because he's already dead."

Both the FBI and the Pentagon are said to be working closely with the CIA to monitor and defend against the zombie army, which reportedly came to light when a CIA mole in Port Au Prince infiltrated a terror cell that was organized and funded by Islamic Jihad.

Intelligence sources say the group "used native Haitian voodoo priests and priestesses to help them recruit known zombies and create as many as 600 more."

"Zombies aren't simply dead people who rise up out of their graves and shuffle around town spooking people like you see in the movies," explains one CIA source.

"They're almost always murder victims who have been 'reanimated' as slaves by a voodoo priest or priestess in a voodoo ritual.

"The life force that keeps normal people alive and vital is long gone" replaced by an 'occult energy' that means the zombie can't be killed by usual means. Nor does it make any allowance for free will.

"Zombies don't have minds of their own. They don't answer to God or even to the Devil. They are controlled by the men and women who create them.

"If their human masters tell them to jump in a lake, they'll do it. If they tell them to kick down the doors to a nuclear power plant or detonate a 'dirty bomb' in downtown Miami, it's a done deal." According to sources, both the FBI and the Pentagon have hired "paranormal consultants" to help them develop a plan for stopping the zombie army with the least amount of risk to American assets.

Insiders are tight-lipped -- but as one puts it, "Those consultants may include a few voodoo priests of our own." "If we can't figure out how to stop the zombies using conventional means, we can always vaporize them with nuclear weapons," concludes one Pentagon source.

"The big question is how far Americans are willing to go to eliminate the threat. It's one thing to drop a few nukes on Japan to polish off World War II -- that's on the other side of the world.

"It's quite another to see mushroom clouds in your own back yard."

By DICK TURPIN
Correspondent
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