i would give her complete space. tell her how you feel in a way that is not blaming her for your feelings. then try to let go completely and move on. endless tugging at her and emotional interactions will just kill it entirely. trust me. been there, done that.
i am telling you what i now wish i had done. now, years later, i can see that i pushed him further away by trying so hard to work things out.
let her know that you love her.
show yourself that you are capable of having a fufilling life without her.
i liked the suggestion to go back to school, to move somewhere cool....
that worked for me. i had to actually move away from the town i lived in.
now i am about to re-enter the academic world as a junior working for my BFA at 38
and i am not hurting anymore about this past boyfriend.
i am actually glad we broke up because it made me examine my life and goals for the future.
31 is not too old. jeesh.
do something nice for yourself. get a message. go on a trip.
go camping, do a fast...