Re: I just turned 18..

Dear Seasoncharmer,
From what you wrote, it seems like things are not CRAZY bad like they used to be, but realize this,...that what happened to you in the past was not just a crime LEGALLY, it was a crime against humanity, but more important, it was a crime against YOU, and keeping your vow of silence was misguided because that allowed it to continue, BUT, you meant well and didn't know any better (I am saying outright that a vow of silence about abuse should NEVER be kept because I don't want anyone else reading this to get the wrong idea). Even though it was a mistake to keep the silence, since it is in the past and you did it in GOOD conscience, let the past be the past. What you have to deal with now is the present, but also...the FUTURE. Many abuse victims become child abusers later on in life (not all). Do not convince yourself that you will automatically be unfit as a parent, you love your parents because you have love in your heart, but it is time to stop allowing the abuse so it doesn't get any worse, you are already suffering consequences PHYSICALLY and emotionally (Circulation problems). Depending on your strength of character, identity peer support (friends), it might be possible that you don't need counseling in order to recover emotionally, but talk to your mother and remind her that what she is doing has to stop.