Re: Stressed about seeing my sexual abuser, PLEASE HELP

Hi there,

Personally, I think this abuser should be charged and be answerable to the law and be put in jail for his crimes against you.

Many abuse victims don't want to go through the abuse all over again by bringing charges against the abuser, and I can understand why many people don't. I also don't know what the law is in your country, but in mine (Australia), many report incidents years after the fact and get some satisfaction from doing so with receiving compensation or whatever is deemed appropriate.

Abuse of young ones by family members is far too common, and far too commonly swept under the carpet.

I think the most important thing right now is for you to feel safe and to do whatever is in your own best interests at the present moment. If you aren't up to going, don't go. I don't think you are obliged to do anything; after all you are the victim and you are the one who has been compromised and significantly wounded.

I believe it is you that should have the most support and understanding at this time from everyone including family members and the supports you have in place.

If you feel your current counsellor isn't up to managing this situation and supporting you, perhaps talk an additional person who you feel is 100 percent behind you. You deserve it, and that is what is right and just in this situation.

Protect yourself and don't go out of your way to be nice, to fit in and/or to please anyone this xmas. Just do what you feel you can. Put yourself first.

Take care, hope you post again and let us know how you go.

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