not sexually turned on by fiance

so I've been with the same guys since I was 17. He's the only guy I've ever "been" with.(im 23 now). when we started having sex, it was good- I was always wanting to. He also used to be a really bad boyfriend then and we eventually took time apart (I was devastated and didnt meet other guys, while he met/kissed other girls). We got back together about 2 years ago and he's changed. he's not the horrible, terrrible person he was before. But he did abuse me in the past and maybe that's why im no longer sexually attracted to him. I have no sex drive when it comes to him. I do know another guy and he turns me on more by touching my back than I get turned on when my fiance wants sex. i havent had sex in like a year- i use the excuse were getting married in a catholic church and i want the wedding night to be special. but now i am thinking i want to be with this other guy.... im supposed to be married in a few months... Tweet