Re: When you're stuck in a grey area...
AGREED!
.........FIVE MONTHS!!! Surely you're not making wedding plans?
I'm still in the black and white area after living with my man for three years. He still has time to show me something about him that isn't perfect and I can just leave. I mean, yeah it sucks and it's difficult and we're attached financially and everything too and might as well be married BUT we're not!
And at five months....we lived together. and it was easier to just up and go then. MUCH easier. It only gets harder as you let the problem go along. HE IS NOT GOING TO GET BETTER ANY TIME SOON. You can't decide after five years that you want to nurse this man back to health for the rest of both your lives.
You haven't been with him long and I know how an attachment can build when you spend every waking moment together but if he's not the person you want when he's wasted then...he's not the person you want. He was an alcoholic when you met him and you're already trying to change him. You CANNOT change a person. You really think you're in love with this guy when one of the biggest flaws that takes over his personality 4-5 times a month and a little every night is one of your biggest problems with him? Give me a break. Trust me. I know what it's like to attach when it's not right.
At five months you should be able to accept him for everything he is and love him for all his flaws. Are you doing that? Nope...you're running to mommy (HIS mommy) and telling on him. Quit it. Just quit it. Leave him alone. I'm almost certain that you're just finally getting really comfortable with him and serious so you're trying to play god relationship wise. Most girls do that after 4-6 months and that's the 6 month hump. Good luck at the 1 year hump. Maybe then you can battle his alcoholism that didn't get stopped at the 6 month hump.