Re: Feeling of Sadness

You have the heart of a poet (certainly not made of stone), it's not surprising that you would end up feeling uncomfortable in this world built on injustice, egotistical resentment of others, and corruption. I suffered 51 years of suicidal Depression (never any therapy, I outlived my dysfunctional family).

Probably the biggest mistake we make all of our lives is thinking that this world and life should make sense (be logical and rational). Peaceful coexistence (peace and harmony) is logical, evil is illogical, so how could this world make sense? But, I've also realized that life is not supposed to make sense,...if it did, all the excitement, suspense, and adventure of living life would disappear (go figure).

My dysfunctional family destroyed my pride (inferiority complex). I was alienated, demoralized, and couldn't believe that I'm supposed to enjoy life. On top of that, before I was 10, I realized that my parents weren't a match made in heaven. They seperated when I was 15 and divorced years later, but it was before I was 10 that my identity (self-realization) began to disappear. After that, all of my life, I felt that "something" in or about my life was "wrong". When I outlived everyone else in the family, I realized what that "something" was, I had no "roots", no identity because a real "family" (a stable family) never existed (no real feeling of SELF).

I never had a true sense of belonging (I always spoke of the human race as "THEY", as though I was not one of "they"). I looked up the statistics on children of divorced parents. Children of divorce very often have this problem "no roots/no identity (divorce or not, it's the unstable "dysfunctional" family that causes this alienation of the child,...as though we "don't belong") and suffer Depression into adulthood, late adulthood, and sometimes their whole life unless and until they realize and understand what caused their feeling of "not belonging".

Understanding SELF (who you really are) and "being" that person is what will free you of Depression (God's true name is "I am who I am", Exodus 3:14). I'm still not impressed with this world of corruption and injustice, but I'm not half as sad/depressed as I used to be (because I have a good sense of justice/right and wrong). I understand that I never would have been sad and gotten depressed if I were not a "thinker", conscientious, and had the "heart of a poet" and know love as a sentiment instead of just an emotion (sentimental ATTACHMENT to anything is bad, but knowing the SENTIMENT of love is not).

I know that you can understand every word and idea/concept that I have written,...because a "thinker" is INSIGHTFUL (because of your humility, I will not ask you to agree, but neither can you deny it).