Re: How can you believe in AA if you dont believe in God.

Toxnomore,

I am not an AA member nor do know all of the 12 steps or have ever been to an AA meeting. I am compelled by my history and my familiarity of this disease to respond to your post.

First I would like to say that I think it is fantastic and a sign of great strength that you have decided to take the step to get some help. Please don't ever think that asking for help is a sign of weakness...it take great courage and strength. Talking to people, even here at curezone is a large step. Every journey starts with one step.

I am from a heavily alcoholic family which goes back many generations. My grandfather was one of four brothers and he was the only one who wasn't an alcoholic. I grew up in 2 alcoholic families. Like many, my parents divorced when I was a baby. When I was 3 my mom remarried a man who was a heavy drinker and drug user. She eventually became the same and lost my twin sister and I when I was 6 and we moved in with my Dad. After 6 months my mom showed the judge that she had cleaned up and we were given back. My mom continued to drink and use drugs for the next 10 years. I did not notice as my mom was not a very heavy drinker but from what she tells me now she drank just about every day. A couple shots before work, when she got home, before going out for pizza. I guess you could say she was a functional alcoholic. My stepfather was a very heavy drinker and drug user and was very hard to get along with. He was also a functional alcoholic. He drank all the time. When I was about 16 my mom decided she didn't want to smoke pot or drink anymore. She had been going to AA for years on and off. Her marriage ended after that and they divorced when I was 18. My mom has been sober for almost 5 years and I am very proud of her. She has a boyfriend who is also a recovering alcoholic and they lead couples meetings as well as other meetings. My mom's boyfriend is also a sponsor.

I'm going to back track a little here....

When I was 8 my dad married a woman who later became and alcoholic. Their marriage lasted 17 years before my dad left her. Her alcoholism tore their marriage apart. She went to rehab when I was 16 but was drinking within a month of getting out.

Back to the present. My twin sister and I are now 27. We were surrounded by alcoholism our entire lives. My sister is an alcoholic. She has not admitted it nor has she taken any steps to stop drinking. We drank heavily as teenagers and started very early. Living in alcoholic families it was easy to drink and I was getting drunk with my step-mom at the age of 16. Although my drinking has become more social over the years my sister went a different way. My sister has a very bad drinking problem. She doesn't drink every day but binges on the weekends, drinks in the morning and drinks in secret so her husband won't get mad. One minute she's sober the next drunk. We are very worried about her. It is heavily effecting her marriage, her health and her relationships. My father is very worried as my sister acts very much like my step-mom.

The reason I am telling you this is to show you how one persons alcoholism can affect others. Alcoholism was already in my genes and my sisters but our chances of being alcoholics were heavily increased by the fact that we had several parental figures that were alcoholics. You seemed very concerned about your family, your sons and the fact that your drinking it affecting them. Your concerns are very well justified. My mom's boyfriend who has been sober for 9 or 10 years is just now beginning to mend his relationships with his 4 children. They were so very hurt and angry with him.

Getting help here, going to AA will change your life. There is fun beyond drinking. There is life and love beyond drinking. Getting help will not only change your life but the lives of your family. Your sons and your wife. I have seen so very many family torn apart by drugs and alcohol...it's scary and it's true. Your children will see your example and it will change them. If you think that your children have been affected my your drinking I would highly suggest getting them involved in Alanon and Alateen, they are wonderful programs.

Just remember you always have help...all you have to do is ask.

Many blessings to you and to your family. Tweet