It's still hard for me to believe

Even though I got out very early, it is hard for me to believe it actually happened. It is so hard for me to believe people think like that, because I try to see the good in everyone, it so foreign and different to the way I think.

The red flags are anything that makes you uncomfortable. The key is recogizing that something is bothering you, however small it seems, it just doesn't feel right to you. These feelings are TRUTH. You have to be in touch with your gut feelings, your intuition, or spirit, whatever you call it. If I had not listened to that and instead tried to analyze the situation intellectually, it would have been much worse. I became alert and saw a pattern of disrespect, especially toward women, but it was also very general toward anyone he disagreed with, however small the issue was. You are also right that he didn't have friends, he didn't get along with family, or co-workers, never had anyone over, etc. All his friendships were on-line, mostly dog lists. He would say he was very selective about women, friendships, etc. But the reality is he just turned everyone off, and I would have seen it right away had I lived near him. Even thousands of miles away by phone, the negative energy was obvious, he was a big energy vampire.

They think very differently than most people. It was like talking to someone from an alternate reality where black means white, plus means minus, etc. I could never figure him out, his reactions were almost always the opposite of what you would expect. But, they were almost exclusively negative. An acquaintance of his tried as a surprise to fix him up with a woman because he felt sorry for him. I had just left him. His response was, how dare he fix me up with someone wearing makeup and jewelry, she's materialistic, I hate her, he has some nerve setting me up! Who does he think he is? He was enraged! He was going to give the friend a piece of his mind! He told me this himself, when he was hoping I would come back! That was his attidude. Most people would have given the woman a chance and been grateful that his friend cared enough to set him up, said thanks for thinking of me anyway, but no, not him! So maybe his friend will catch on. That lucky woman dodged a screaming bullet as well. It's like he is lacking something fundamental in connecting and relating to people, almost as if they were things or props.

He was totally lacking in normal social boundaries. The kind of person who would snoop through your stuff behind your back, lie or forge your name on a legal document. He actually stole my email to spy on me. He would interrogate me as a demand to know where I was, what I did, and who I was with. I would say, "whatever I wanted to do with whoever I was with wherever I was" then he would say, I'm not interrogating you, it's just that I care so much, I want to protect you. It only happened twice, the second time I told him I was on to him and NEVER interrogate me again! Whenver he knew he crossed the line, he would retreat, be nice and act as if he cared and I misunderstood.

I can't help but feel sorry for him. He makes his life so deliberately difficult and is missing out on many of joys of life. The Law of Attraction at work. Very sad. I wonder what the actual cause is, where the break happened, and if this could be prevented with therapy at a young age. Tweet