In answer to your message: How important is sexual attraction?

hey mxcen, When I was young and very stupid at age 18 I also ignorantly let myself get brainwashed & got involved with a man and ended up marrying him. I was with him a very, exceedingly unhappy 7 years. My 2 grown sons are by him. But at times I think of how different my life might have turned out if I would have been stirred in the right direction. I'm not saying I regret having my 2 boys for they've been the joy of my life. So if you didn't marry him for love you must have needed him for security (money) sake. Sorry to say this to you, I don't mean to offend. You wouldn't be the 1st woman to do this. My 1st husband was like my best friend to and I was afraid to work and his grandmother supported us a certain % although we were still very poor. Anyway, now you must do the right thing for yourself (and him to), you must get yourself out of it because you will never, ever be happy - take my word for it - I know from being there - from experience. You need to tell him unless it would be dangerous to tell him. If he has violent tendencys then you need to just leave him and communicate it in another way. Since he's a foreigner he might think he owns you or something. Foreigners have weird concepts of women - some of them regard women as 2nd class citizens. I think my boyfrind (X-boyfriend) does. But your marriage is a farce since you don't really love him. Why cheat yourself of love your whole entire live when you could really find it. Take care. Hope I helped.