Re: Is it human nature to be with the same person for so long?

I admire your honesty. I sincerely do. In regards to my daughter, there were no red flags in beginning. They seemed to have mutual respect for one another and showed affection. That is certainly no longer the case. It changed a couple years into the relationship. My daughter does understand my position. She and I talk often. She truly seems to understand. She's very insightful and intelligent herself.

As for his son, it is not ONLY disgust, but more like dissapointment. He is very proud of our son. We both are. He is quite the phenomenal little man.

I struggled with the guilt of him being so difficult on my daughter. So much so that I sought my own counseling. It helped some, but the message I received from the respected psychologist just didn't feel right in my heart. He tried to tell me there was plenty of time left for husband and daughter to get close as I poured my heart out to him telling him that it was just too late. She has 2 years of high school left. This is the most difficult time for even a close mother like myself to breakthrough, let alone a stepfather she despises.

Also, all the "I love you"'s in the world doesn't make it so. Talk is cheap; a person shows who they REALLY are by their actions. So far, we've heard nothing about any loving actions. I have to conclude that you are living in the past when you say you know he loves you "dearly". I don't see that at all. He may NEED you. But it's not the same thing.

Your last paragraph really hit home. [[[If I were you, I'd get counselling for myself to find out why the attraction to suicidal and/or self-absorbed sex addicts who can't love. Why you would put yourself and - most importantly - your CHILD through this. I think that's the first step for you, rather than focusing on what's wrong with him and monitoring his p 0 r n addiction. It might give you the strength you need.]]] This really has substance to it. Again, more valuable viewpoints from curezone that I have longed for.

Thank you so much for your honesty and insight.