You need to have a 24 hr saliva test done to check your adrenals. If you can't find a doc you can order online at
http://www.canaryclub.com.
I would also have my thyroid checked and for it you need the following tests:

TSH
Free T3
Free T4
Anti-TP0 ... To check for Hashimtos
TgAb .... To check for Hashimotos

After getting these tests I would highly recommend that you post the results on a forum called
http://www.stopthethyroidmadness.com
They have some great mods there that can help you interpret the results and answer any questions you might have.

Your symptoms definitely sound adrenal/thyroid related. I am dealing with both as well and the site I mentioned above as helped me tremendously.

Good luck and please get the tests done so you can get started on getting back to feeling like your old self again and get that book published.

Deb

Fasting has its problems. People often feel like they're starving during or after a fast, for some reason. It may be that what they're starving for is good fats. See
http://www.drcranton.com/nutrition/oiling.htm.
Getting plenty of good fats in the diet apparently satisfies hunger better than other foods do. Coconut oil is said to be the best fat, but butter, olive oil, raw eggs, nuts, cheese, meat etc are good sources too. Carlson's fish oils are among the best for omega-3 fats, because they're cleansed of mercury and other heavy metals. Fish oil has DHA and EPA, which are important for the brain and nervous system, as are other fats too. Your emotions may be a sign of insufficient good fats.

I fasted 56 days in 1981 with a chiropractor who did it a couple of weeks longer. I'm 5'8 and I went from about 155# to 103. I intended to start a completely raw food diet at that time, but when I got off the fast I started compulsively eating french fries etc. A year later I succeeded at getting on a raw food diet. I found that blending about 4 bananas with water and flavoring, like carob powder, 2 drops of vanilla, or a few strawberries, satisfied my hunger better than any whole fruits or vegs, for some reason.

Puking ten times a day for a few months is bound to be unhealthful. The gastric juices damage the mucus lining of the esophagus, when one pukes. Also they lose all the digestive enzymes from the lost saliva etc. So the body has to go through the trouble to rebuild the supply of salivary and gastric juices, like amylase and hydrochloric acid. A low salt diet makes it hard for people to get enough hydrochloric acid by the way, which makes it hard to digest protein. I use Sea Salt , but the best is said to be Celtic Sea Salt , because it has good minerals. I found some in Boston 2 years ago for just a couple dollars per pound.

Dr. Schulze says fresh hawthorne berries are excellent for protecting the heart. Dr. West says natural Vitamin B4 is important for preventing cramps in heart muscle and maybe other muscles. [Www.vitaminconsumertips.com/vitamins/vitamin_b4.php says Vitamin B4, also referred to as adenine, is one of the many B vitamins. Many people do not know that vitamin B4 is one of the bases that help to compose both RNA and DNA. Vitamin B4 works alongside other enzymes in order to produce energy. So as you can imagine, without the proper amount of vitamin B4 you may run into problems as far as having enough energy is concerned. ... The best dietary option [for] vitamin B4 ... is fresh vegetables, fresh fruits, and honey.] Dr. West says you can't get this vitamin from supplements, as it breaks down in processing.

Kefir can help restore your digestive enzymes. Some health food stores, or
http://www.torontoadvisors.com/Kefir/kefir-list.php,
are good sources. It reproduces itself. All you have to do is add milk. It's a good probiotic as well as a source of enzymes and other nutrients.

I'd do the oil pulling, i.e. rinsing the teeth and gums with olive oil or other oils for ten minutes at a time at least once a day. It kills hidden infections in the mouth which tend to become systemic and to suppress the immune system. Restoring the immune system would improve your overall health.

Get yourself good water, with no chlorine or fluoride.

My guess is that you just have some of the above deficiencies, causing your emotions, nervousness etc. I'd say sleep as long as your body wants to. Sleeping allows it to heal and restore energy.

Holy crap...you poor kid. I'm not sure why you posted on the OP forum, and if you are praticing OP, but I'd start right away. OP makes me calm and I have no idea why....perhaps the essential fatty acids.

Maybe it's time to get a simple bloodwork done by the lab coats, in my humble opinion.

But to me it sounds like you are suffering from some kind of anxiety disorder which can be either physcial or mental. This can certainly cause the crying jags and depression. How do you assess yourself for something like that? How can you start treating yourself naturally if this is what you have? Perhaps it is something as simple as blood sugar, perhaps something more sinister like Chronic Fatigue or even chemical sensitivity.

No matter what I think the time for self assessment is over and time to turn to some more expert opinions. Of course you don't need to follow their advice but maybe something might reasonate with you on your journey.

I so wish I had something to offer you and feel somewhat helpless. I don't know if you cross posted this, but I think you have excellent support here at curezone.

Molly

Good lord honey, I just wanna take you in my arms and hold you and make everything better for you. :(
Im only a lil younger than you-24-and Ive been through tons of problems, feeling like crap, etc etc. I understand the feeling "Should I just die?" Ive been through severe depression/anxiety disorders, eating disorders, drug and alcohol addictions, HORRIBLE hormonal problems including cystic Acne so severe I couldnt barely talk or make facial expressions without horrible pain, Psoriasis that covered 90% of my body for a year, and another episode that lasted a month or two, etc. I could go on and on, theres lots of stuff and Im only saying all that to hopefully give you some hope, Im doing much better now, Im still working on myself but this is probably the healthiest Ive ever been in my life. There ARE answers to everything, I fully believe that. I also know how you feel about conventional medicine. I only go to doctors in some severe cases, such as having bad bronchitis and needing Antibiotics , which I despise and only take if I have to.
I am no expert on adrenal/thyroid type issues but it seems some of the other people have given some good suggestions in that area.
I have no idea what all you have tried, so Ill just suggest some things that have helped me.
---The supplement SAM-e. Its really amazing stuff. Ive been on a handful of prescription medications for depression/anxiety, as well as st. johns wort and some other stuff, and nothing has ever helped me feel balanced as much as the sam-e. It also makes me feel healthier overall, I have some joint issues that I barely notice anymore since taking my sam-e every day for months now. Its also supposed to be good for the liver.
--Essential fatty acids and coconut oil. I feel much better since making sure I get these. Im a vegetarian so I take a supplement thats a blend of evening primrose oil, flaxseed oil, and borage oil. Its amazing stuff. Since taking coconut oil and using it for cooking I feel healthier too. I noticed I get the chills less the more of it I take (Im also hypoglycemic and have weird reactions to eating, not quit the same as you though. Often times when I eat I get ICE cold afterwards to the point of shaking, I have no idea what this means but its been better lately}. I also pull with coconut oil once a day but Ive been only doing this for about a week and a half now.
---another supplement, chromium picolinate. Good for blood sugar, this has helped a lot. Less crashes.
---Have you ever done any parasite cleansing? It has helped me...I dont know what I had going on in there but after completeing the paragone cleanse I felt different...my blood Sugar seemed more stable. I think everyone should probably parasite cleanse here and there...there is a lot of grossness that can be happening and I felt it was a good thing for me.
--- Liver Flushing of course...but like I said I dont know what cleanses you have done, or if you have already tried this.

Those are just some of the things that have been helping me...I agree that it might be worth it to have a full blood workup done if you have the financial means to do so. If conventional medicine could actually find out something specific you have going on, it would point you in the right direction to finding alternative treatments that could help.

Please dont give up. Ill be praying for you. ~

Have you done a parasite cleanse?

Hi, A.H. --

I am sorry you are feeling so hopeless, but glad that you found the OP forum -- it's really a simple and great therapy, and a good introduction to cleansing and detox in general. And this forum is really a wonderful place of which to feel a part, which is so helpful when one is feeling like life is not an easy experience. Please stick around, try OP, and join us -- you will find a lot of humor and support, and when you can pass on your knowledge and experience to others, you'll really feel better!

My advice to anyone who feels as despondent as you sound in your post is to treat the spiritual, because the mental and physical will follow. It really has to be in that order of priority -- you can develop goals for cleansing, detox, diet, etc. that can make you feel better, but it is really the fundamental shift that will occur when you start to make connections to God/a higher power/the universe/whatever you call it, through service to others, that will allow everything else in your life -- your relationship to food, your health, your work, your relationships with people, etc. -- to fall into place.

Nothing else is going to make a difference until you do this. There are lots of people in this world -- indeed, right here at Curezone -- who think that the right diet, the right supplements/vitamins, the right therapies, the right amount of exercise, etc. will make them OK. But you can't treat the spiritual by treating the physical -- if you have been bulimic, lost a hundred pounds, been unhappy -- well, you know, then, that solving a weight problem isn't what makes you feel OK.

There are also lots of people who may suggest treating the mental -- in my experience, if you go to a counselor or therapist, and try to come up with a story to support why you feel as bad as you do, it's just going to obscure the underlying problem -- the essential malady, which is lack of connection to others through service. Period. I see people do this all the time when they try to stop drinking/using drugs (where a lot of the same stuff exists as does around food) -- they are supported by a professional in logic like, "Well of COURSE I tried to drink my way to happiness -- if you had the childhood I did, you'd be drunk all the time, too!" Then, feelings like this are encouraged and validated by the group or therapist, and the person never gets the simple tools they need to move beyond the limited perspective in which they are therefore even more stuck, and into a place where they can experience real relief.

No book or concomitant success will help you feel better in and of itself. My dad was a writer, I am a writer, and I grew up around and know some some really prolific and bestselling authors, and the only ones I know who are really happy in general are the ones who were OK to begin with. Otherwise it's a hard and ego-driven world -- the publishing industry, the criticism mill, and plunging book sales combine to make writers some of the most unhappy people around! My dear friend Andrew SOlomon wrote a book several years ago on Depression which was a huge bestseller, got a lot of critical acclaim, and won the National Book Award -- it did not, however, solve his depression! (cf. "The Noonday Demon: An Atlas of Depression" -- Scribner's, 2001)

You have the perfect solution to your troubles in your own e-mail -- asking God to relieve you of your difficulties. Why doesn't this seem to have worked for you so far? Probably you need to do a little work to clear up what is blocking you from your higher power. Try asking for help not for you, but so that you can better be of service to others. Try only asking that everything that troubles you be taken away so that you can be helpful and kind to the people in your path each day. It sounds simplistic, but it has worked for many. Where everything else has failed.

A good first step you could really accomplish with OP -- try the process, which you will see outlined at
http://www.oilpulling.com.
Use the OP time to meditate on getting back to that place or part of you that you cherish -- I was struck by your comment about being funny, because I got to that point, too -- where I felt like my "light" had just gone out for good! But you can ask for that to be restored, and it's a great place to start, because God always shows up in humor.

Please keep us posted as to how you are, and share your OP experience. There are so many here who will help you and make you feel a part of this wonderful community! I am so glad you found this forum.

Laura

Humm I do have to say yes, you are destined to die---as are we all. It really isn't a matter of 'if' as much as 'when', eh? And with how much suffering. At least we do have some control over the suffering and to a lesser extent the 'when', thank goodness!
Actually I am with the thyroid problem camp. I didn't get so far into the madness and pain you described, but I think I was headed there, with pretty severe mood shifts and on going exhaustion. Some of my other symtoms were calf muscle cramping and my hair started falling out pretty rapidly. Luckily I figured out that my thyroid might be at the root of the problem, or at least my liver's ability to convert the t-4 that the thyroid makes into the t-3 the body uses. I got the doc to give me cytomel, a synthetic t-3 replacement, and things started to turn around almost immediately. Once I saw that helped, I went ahead and did a couple of Liver Flushes which allowed me to lower the amount of t-3 I was taking by nearly half. Then about 8 months ago I discovered EFT (Emotional freedom techiques) and started tapping for low t-3 levels and now I don't even need the t-3 any more! BTW, I would recommend for anyone to check out EFT
http://www.emofree.com/
I am finding it can work miracles!

Anyway, good luck with all this stuff. For sure it isn't all that easy (which is why too many people depend on doctors to do all the hard foot work for them, I think) but you are the only one who you can depend on to have your best interests at heart, eh? So who better to take the time to figure it out? If nothing else, you can go into the doc's better informed and less gullible as to what should be done and avoid that whole 'prescribe you this for that, and then prescribe you this to counteract the side effects of that...' syndrome.

This is a pretty "out-there" suggestion, but... have you considered that it might be entity attachment, also known as spirit possession? Some of the things you said in your post made me think that this could be the root of your problems. Do some research on it if you think it's a possibility.

Symptoms of spirit attachment can include (taken from various sources):

- An inner voice that constantly criticizes you
- A variety of changing physical maladies with no obvious cause
- Irrational fear, anger, sadness or guilt or suicidal tendencies
- Hearing voices
- Sudden weight gain or loss
- Fears and phobias
- Sudden changes in behavior--such as increased anger, Depression and thoughts of suicide
- Serious illness of unknown cause
- Loss of energy
- Memory and concentration problems
- Unexplained physical problems--such as pain from an undetermined cause
- Migraine headaches
- Night terrors and nightmares
- Panic or anxiety attacks
- Multiple personalities
- Sudden depression, rage, edginess, anger, sadness, or anxiety
- Feeling suddenly dizzy or off-balance
- Sleeplessness
- Repetitive or weird thoughts
- Personality changes, loss of "self"
- Chronic or sudden health concerns
- Manic depression
- Outbursts
- Addictions
- Relationship problems

Some common situations creating susceptibility for attachment:
* Traumatic accident
* Surgery, especially with anesthesia
* Substance abuse (Even a few beers are enough to open your shield)
* Sickness, fever
* Depression, anxiety, stress
* Jealousy, attached love, wanting revenge, wanting to control
* Addictions, Gambling
* Violence, intimidation, fear
* Incest, abusive sex
* Death in the family, inappropriate attached "compassion"
* Non-discerning channeling or naive use of pendulum and ouija board
* Practicing magic (black or gray)
* Out-of-Body Experience without appropriate precaution