this of course is nonsense. there really is such a thing as "an insult" there really is such a thing as "abuse" these are REAL concepts, they are not just imaginings, they are not just "perceptions"
if a woman went ro the cops complaining of abuse by her husband, because he physcially beat her, and the cops said "well you know its just a perception thing. if you percieve it to be abuse them it is. but if you percieve that being smacked with a closed fist every night is not abuse, then it aint, see?" what would you say to that?
you can't dismiss it all away with "its all a matter of perception" i call bs on that one.