Don't think I'll EVER get better

Here's a COMPLETE list of all my symptoms. I find it utterly DEPRESSING!!

I have been sick for 4 years with one giant set of symptoms, 2 years with the coughing & itching.

First, my Eosinophil count (white blood cells) were flagged HIGH last March.

Besides the chronic unending coughing/hacking--which started out 14 months ago Every Single Time I either ate or drank something, and continues to this day with that. Well... first it was just that, when I ate or drank something, then it was at night time too, then it was also in the morning when I woke up, then it was just ALL the time at random, along with still every time after I eat or drink anything. That's where it stands now. The coughing.

My chest is severely constricted too. Breathing is difficult, can't take in full deep breaths. My chest hurts at all times. Feels like it's tightened, shrunk, to the size of a fist.

I was severely anemic a yr ago. Had been anemic for well over a yr actually, as it had been almost a yr before when my friends basically FORCED me to go to a doctor for all my medical issues. Was blood tested, but didn't go back for the results for a yr. At that point the doctor said I HAD to go to the ER IMMEDIATELY for a blood transfusion. She didn't know how I was even walking I was so anemic!!

I had 2 blood transfusions, and complained soo much about the coughing, (which they heard at the hospital), that the doctor there x-rayed my lungs. Heard nothing about that outcome.

They also sent me home with creams for the itching, as I complained miserably about the itching that at that time was all over my neck & shoulders. It started around the same time as the coughing. (Which was around 2 months prior to the transfusions.) The itching took months to move from neck & shoulders, to then chest & upper back, to lower back. It was all over the whole upper trunk for months last year, then settled down ONLY in my lower back. (Never moved further down from there.) It had gone away for quite awhile, but re-surfaced 3 weeks into the Toxoplasmosis meds I was taking, which was a little over a month ago now.

My friends "forced me" to go to see a doctor because of my complaints of
EXTREME DIZZYNESS & VERTIGO. (Vertigo where I feel like "I'm" spinning, not the room spinning.) This went on daily, for over a year at that time. Now it equals up to 4 SOLID YEARS of it!!!

I feel like I'm on a boat at all times. Everything pitches forwards & back, from side to side. I can hardly keep my balance. I feel like I'm pitching forwards at all times! Have to reach out to steady myself so I don't fall forward!!

I stagger when I walk as though I'm spastic. (Ataxia.) My gait is from side to side now, not directly forward.

I can't stand up straight, I'm near doubled over. I've lost ALL muscle tone in my abdomen, which happened nearly OVERNIGHT 4 yrs ago!! I basically have ZERO muscle tone there. This was going from running an hour a day, swimming an hour a day--to NOTHING! It makes NO sense!!

I can't lift anything anymore. Trying to walk up stairs is almost impossible, I stagger, I'm bent forward, it takes immense amounts of energy to lift my legs (which use abdominal muscles) to get up them.

If I try to wash dishes at the kitchen sink I can only stand for so long before I'm starting to cave in on myself because I can't hold myself up.

I crave COPIOUS amounts of food, which only makes me excruciatingly shaky & sleepy. I fall asleep for hours afterwards. (One of the 3 symptoms exacerbated by the Albendazole, the other 2 being the dizziness/vertigo,and the shakiness/conking out for hours as soon as I eat.)

Prior to the blood transfusions I craved ICE. For 6 months that's almost all I ate. Three to four pounds a day.

I crave a lot of sugar, chocolate, dairy and potatoes. Having been a raw vegan for 3 years, believing firmly in it, this is utterly bizarre for me!! Especially the dairy. I almost NEVER ate/drank dairy!!

I worked for 3 years while sick. My job consisted mostly of walking. I was so dizzy, suffering from vertigo so badly, that I kept walking into walls CONSTANTLY! Ended up at the ER on several occasions due to the damage I caused myself from walking into walls.

The INTENSE EXHUASTION had me pretty much sleepwalking throughout much of my shifts, which also contributed to the walking into walls.

It took me a year to follow up after my first visit to the doctor's, to find out the results of my blood work, due to the fact of my intense exhaustion, working, and taking care of multiple colonies of stray cats.

I have not worked in a year now so I have been "trying" to get a handle on all this, but the extreme exhaustion, especially after eating, has made it difficult. Even writing all this out has taken days & days to get the energy to do it.

And my brain function... recently found myself seeing "holes" in my thought processes. When one says in conversation, "Oh...that (word) is on the tip of my tongue... trying to remember." And then one eventually DOES remember the word; well for me now I CAN'T remember "said forgotten word." This started about 3 months ago. Horrible!!

I tested positive for Toxoplasmosis. Took Daraprim (pyrimethamine) & Clindamycin for 4 weeks. Week 3 saw the vertigo STOP, I had energy, my brain functioned normally again, the exhaustion STOPPED, and...

It turned out the parasites have/are affecting my mood, quality of life outlook, because I have had a DOOMSDAY outlook on life ever since I got sick, 4 yrs ago. On the Toxo meds at Week 3 my positive outlook on life cane back. I could envision working again, swimming again, looking forward to life again...it was WONDERFUL!!

Eight hours after the last Toxo med, (which was Clindamycin), the horrendous exhaustion returned, the near inability to walk up stairs returned, the doubling over returned, (I was walking/standing up STRAIGHT after 3 weeks on the meds). The vertigo slowly came back, to where now it's constant. The brain "holes" have started to return. The doomsday thought processes returned immediately.

The coughing got WORSE during the Toxo meds. The itching returned... it had been gone for nearly 6 months.

There was also edema on an ankle. That lasted for the first 2 yrs, I was concerned, doctors were concerned, but no explanation for it. Finally it went away.

There was horrible restless leg syndrome for about 4 months before the blood transfusions. That went away after the transfusions. (Though had a bout of it a few months ago for a couple of days...awful!!)

There's acid reflux now, for about the past 6 months on & off. Sometimes really, really bad, other times absolutely nothing.

There's loose & frequent stools now, for the past couple of months. For the 1st two years there was frequent flatulence. That eventually went away. (I thought I was just "healthy", my system functioning "normally", lol.)

I'm so CONFUSED over all this!!! I don't know if I can ever get better! Tweet