Re: Forgiveness means... quote

I do not really want to spend time with anyone. I just need to pray and fast and work out my issues. I just want to be a godly leader for this family. I have failed in many ways. I need to put the correct things in focus. Which is you, mammas hold families together. They are the glue in a very complex composite. Trust must be earned, and is a painful process. But to earn trust forgiveness and mercy is a precursor. Some of the people on this forum have been your friends for years. I understand airing dirty in laundry in public is questionable. Yet I need you to understand publicly that I was wrong for lying to you, and that there is no excuse for it. Our little girl and I prayed together last night and I prayed very hard for forgiveness. I talked to her about the consequences of not being honest even if it is something that you do not consider to be a detrimental issue. I told her that she sees in this situation that when we do something wrong and then try to cover it up it becomes a mess. I also asked her why she tells a lie. Is it because she does not want to be punished? I told her I am sure that is the case sometimes and that we are scared of the consequences of our actions. I told that was part of the case in this instance. I also asked her if sometimes we tell a lie because we are ashamed, and do not want to let a person we love no we did something they did not approve and do not want to hurt them? She said yes, I told that was part of the case as well. We prayed for a while. Then when I put her to bed she put her arms around me and told me I forgive you even if mamma does not. I lost it and she told me I do not have to cry. I love both of you more than life. I know you are saying to yourself if he would lie about something like this what else is he lying about. I am not a monster, I am just a person, a sinner who loves God and loves you. It is hard living with someone who is sick. I am not using this as an excuse. Just stating that I know I cause you stress and I did not want to do that, but I made it worse. Being married to a sick person is hard. I feel I have been good in a lot of ways and bad in others. I will continue to be here if you want me to be so.