I too have had a lot of repressed memories and have felt suicidal. When I did yoga feelings emerged. I was not used to that. Then body memories...
I too have felt suicidal. Worse feeling in the world. I fiinally found a therapist (after 20 years of searching and trying) that will go through the trauma with me as it is too hard to bear alone.
I have found a lot of wise words on curezone too.
I used to live in Seattle and my health and Depression grew worse. I moved to MN where I had more support and then moved to FL where it is sunny. I think my next move is NM where it is dry. but wherever I go my memories and problems go with me.