Good luck! The way I am now after the "controlling" years? I'm afraid that my tactfulness is gone when it comes to heavy criticism, especially by a partner. My poor husband now, who I love dearly, is used to me saying something..."I know you didn't mean to be insulting, unless that is your intent to insult me...is it?" Poor guy ! And usually the sentence ends like....."And if you had intended to insult me, I can only say F*&K You."