Re: Thanks for all your support!

Just wanted to say I am really sorry for what happened to you! What struck me most is that mostly the situations you were in weren't so unusual or stupid after all but just normal. So what I mean is. I cant see any of this being your fault whatsoever. You have done nothing to provoke this by looking cute or being flirty or hanging out with a friend etc. Personally I think you need a good counselor/ therapist. If it makes you feel too bad, dont talk about the incidents but it seems to me that there are some significant factors in your past that might influence how you are preceived by some. Now this is wild guessing but from what I gather about your mom and the way you talk I could see a problem with you putting up personal boundaries. Somehow these people seem to have sensed that by picking you as a victim they are not going to run into too much trouble. Are you afraid of letting people know if they have overstepped a line, even if others might say you acted weird or overreacted? Can you get uncomfortable with people without worrying what others think? I know that part of borderline syndrom has a lot to do with pulling people close and then pushing them away, constantly injuring normal boundaries. As a child of such a person I can only imagine the confusion....

My advice to you is, become a little more focused on your needs and learn to communicate them clearly - no maybes and would yous. Just I dont want this, you accept me that way or go. Also, find a therapist you feel totally confortable with and talk to them about your past- tell them you are not ready to talk about what happened - again, you set the pace, they are getting paid for going with that (thats your first exercise in setting the boundaries).

Also I think you need to forgive yourself for all those little human mistakes like getting drunk or going to somebodys house. You are not stupid and this isnt your fault- no matter how you turn it. Good luck....you might need a while to deal with all this... Tweet