Re: The Wounded Heart will Lead you To Love

thank you for your kind and encouraging words..I may be an obnoxious uptight arsehole most of the time,but I believe that my heart is in the right place.

You ever seen a seemingly frightened dog that is a little weary and overly cautious when you approach it? seems kinda shy and lonely ,needing some love and protection?
but when you try and reach out to help or pet it..it tries to bite your head off?
and a once seemingly bashful and frightened pup turns into a rabid nearly berserk animal lol.

I just get days where everything else in the world is so confusing and I just want to ...disappear. I know it sounds horrible..but that's just how I feel.

Honestly,I want to be in love again but I have a hard time believing that anyone would just accept me for all of my flaws and weaknesses of today,though promising to have a better future for..maybe each other.I know who I am and what I want..but I just have a hard time accepting myself for everything I am ..the good and the bad.Which is another thing..I have a hard time accepting the good and bad in people as well as myself.

I am not the most confident person in the world but more likely then not,I am willing to face fear and plow on through..just right now,girls and love seem to be the most hard to deal with.I am not a virgin or anything...I have just been hurt so horribly that it's hard,so hard to move on and let anyone in..fearing the same outcome,but the time in between was soo awesome,the good and the bad..makes it almost all worth it.
But now being aware of myself being bipolar,paranoid schizophrenic and bisexual..it adds ALOT to the plate and I have so many emotions going on it's so hard to deal with..deep down at the root of it all,I see myself with a beautiful girl and in love,in spite of everything that's going on around me or tried to take me down..

don't know how I am going to get there from a place of such confusion and chaos,but somehow I just believe that everything will be okay ..it just sucks during the hard times and being down and out in the gutter.