I think there is a time and a place for everything...and that time and that place just hasn't happened yet... I am waiting for a type of self actualization that has not happened yet. I am a private pilot. I remember as a young man, whenever things were right for me, I was flying airplanes. I have given up flying but I am not sure what it would take for me to self-actualize in a way that would be right for me to write a book about my NDE. When I am where I need to be to launch my NDE on the world, it will happen but I am not there. It may be that I still have something else left to articukate about my NDE that remains unsaid that I have yet to say but whatever it is, it is something I would know if I saw it...and I am not seeing it... yet.

I was the first in line yesterday morning to watch this movie and it was everything I thought it would be! LOVED IT!!! It's pretty true to the book, too.

Tom Hanks plays his usual Oscar winning role---this time as a nerdy dude, but he is good!

I couldn't agree more with the discussion earlier.......What would be so bad if everyone found out Jesus married Mary? I think it would be great. It's a well known fact that King Constantine portrayed Mary as a whore.....and she NEVER was. This idiot King just couldn't stand a woman receiving recognition and he wanted men to be the "big dogs." But, we woman have ALWAYS known how much smarter we are and cuter, kinder, multi tasker....oh, and did I say modest we are more than men. It's always been said that if there is a great man, he's got to have a greater woman behind him! Of course because she is picking up his socks, cleaning his messes and then gently guiding him in the direction he should already know to go.

OK, I am just kidding about some of that, but we women have ALWAYS gotten an unfair role in society and we can all thank King Constantine for that!

But, please Rudy, let me be your agent! I want to be on Larry King, too. But, we will have to do it quick before we have another hurricane. We are just a couple of weeks away from the 2006 season. Oh, joy.

Your Friend,
Paulette

At least here in CureZone, the females are many of the strongest poetic voices of any people male or female that I know of anywhere. They are not as competitive for dominance as male voices. Female energy to me is often less sterile and often hits deeper truths. I have found this to be multiplied several times over in the non-cyber world. Femenine energy often says a lot to me without even saying a word. I believe that choosing to live in a female body before a soul has entered its mother's womb is to choose a vessel that is less powerful physically so that other more subtle energies can emerge. There is power to knock down a door and there is another way to open a locked door that is nothing more than asking the landlord for a key. Female energy doen't have to respond with brute force. Perhaps, the male dominated authors of most religions dominate the words in black and white and even red but maybe it is female energy that moves in the white space in the space between...connecting words to actions... Could it be that males see black and white... but it is more often females who see the shades of grey? I don't know from my NDE but for me, many of the lessons we learnm we learn in Playground Politics 101.

I believe souls that choose to become a woman more often learn the language of relationships that is not in the physical world but rather in the etheral world at the expense of the solid mechanical world. I have been involved in working with and teaching young people for over ten years now and I have found that girls more often complete mechanical activities better than boys. This is not always true. Sometimes girls do not have the physical strength to manipulate some mechanical objects and will give up on some some mechanical activities but in my experience, girl's arrows hit the target closer to the heart, their rockets fly more true because girls are much more willing to go through the steps it takes to avoid failure than boys. Boys want to go straight to final gratification of launching the rocket than slowly waiting for the glue to dry so they often want to skip the in betweens. Girls are not necessarily smarter than boys but rather they are willing to do the work to get to the correct answer while the boys are racing to get to any answer first. The boys on the playground or archery range will take away the rocket or pretty red car from a girl or take the bow and arrow away from girls even if the girl's rocket can fly higher and even if a girl's arrows hits its mark more often. On the playground, the girls give up their rockets, arrows, and pretty red cars and huddle together to protect themselves from injury and learn...even if they can't speak in words yet, little girls say a lot to teach other. They are learning another way.

The publication of words in sacred script and words on the front pages of newspapers are often filled with darting arrows and rockets with words written most often by male dominated authors and so it goes that a female's words more often end up on page two and beyond. And so it goes in life as in print that girls often let go of flying rockets and shooting arrows. From my observations though, girls figure out what is working for them more quickly than boys do so when the girls come of age, they "dummy down" to accept a role they most often play to become the answer for the boys who have lost their way. Pre-teen girls will often unlearn what they knew to acheive another kind learning. Don't get me wrong, there are many women shooting darts across the stars and their arrows are just as deadly however women most often remove themselves from the act of shooting the arrows or launching the rocket that starts the war. The prisons are filled with men and the graves in wars are filled with men as well but still there are a few jealous women who end up in prison, there most often because they were betrayed by a man or humiliated by a woman. Many times more women and children die of starvation and disease without glory or honor in shallow graves spread throughout the war torn world. Women often pay a high price for supporting men who want to play with rockets and arrows. I don't know much about this from my NDE as there was no male or female energy in heaven in my NDE but I can see some things from knowing what is not male or female energy.

I have no greater appreciation for either male or female on the playground because both male and female energy can lead to loving kindness but the misuse of either energy could lead to the grave. That said, I have recognized it is more often female energy on the playscape of life that leads to cooperation and sharing. If cooperation leads to sharing then that is the pinacle of playground politics but if cooperation leads to ostrasizing the weak then it is a misuse of female energy.
it is more often the girls who will gang up together to humiliate another girl.

Mary Magdeline to me is the best use of female energy in the places inbetween the lines of the words in red when Jesus said, Blessed are the meek[gentle...holding back from asserting one's own power] for they shall inherit the earth. If one's energy is used to create peace and cooperation and genltleness rather than usurping power and control then it is most often a role modeled by a gentle woman. Mary Magdeline, being weak and lowly in heart, did not write the words Jesus spoke of but can you see the meek and lowly or the least becoming greatest coming from a Mary Magdeline rahter than from the twelve diciples?

I have a lot of female energy but that has not always been true(even if my male energy gets out of control sometimes) but it didn't come from my core self...I was heading straight to destroying the whole planet and murdering millions of Communists and Athesits before my NDE. I planned and plotted and schemed for much of my young life about how to become a weapon of war and glory. Before I died, and had a meeting with God, my desire was to kill Communists and Atheists but meeting God, my desire to kill died with me.

I met a God in my NDE who was neither male or female and a pre[Mary Magdeline] Jesus was neither male or female. I still call that pre-Jesus I met in heaven a he because of my cultural background but the Jesus I met in heaven was much larger than male or female energy... The energy I received from the being who stood beside me in the courtroom in my NDE was the energy of an advocate and friend...a better friend I have never known before or since then... A friend who protected my back and showed me what was important... loving kindness and joy...and how everything else is less than meaningless....

The Jesus I read about in holy texts is a lesser form of the Jesus I met in heaven but I can still identify the Jesus in heaven and the Jesus of Matthew, Mark, Luke, & John as the same soul. I can also see an angry Jesus getting hung on a tree for pissing off the money changers trying to make money from religion as Jesus' male energy coming from a lesser place than the love that came from my pre-Jesus friend in heaven. I can also see the Jesus I met in heaven as a Jesus on earth telling us to love our neighbors and helping widows and orphans as influenced by the female energy of Jesus' mother and Mary Magdeline... I believe the physical Yahshua(son of Yah) may have been a student of male dominated religions found the selfish human act of female kindness to acheive a future reward such as inherting the earth as superior to the male energy of physical power and control of the earth. I believe the male energy of power and control of the physical world is the polar opposite of the loving kindness the Jesus of my childhood religion had from being intimate with a God who is Loving Kindness...While female energy is selfish loving kindness and male energy blunt power and control, both male and female energy ultimately are selfish... removing the physical from flesh, male and energy falls away...and all that is the loving kindness that is Yah.

Many people of my domga believe Jesus is " God" but from my NDE, I can tell you that Jesus is not "God" but rather a reflection of "God" and so are you and so I am as well when we act with loving kindness and not the selfish act of loving kindness but the unselfish intention free of the the selfish desire to acheive a reward for being loving kindness. The Jesus I met in heaven didn't brag about who he was but always conceded to love(Yah=God=Love). "God Stuff" is neither male nor female but the intention of lovingkindness free of male or female energy.

Ghandi embodied a selfish female energy of recieving a physical reward for steadfast firm peaceful non-violent protest. That "God" part of Jesus was neither male or female energy but I believe that female energy is what gave Jesus' selfish message of loving your neighbor as yourself being a reward legs to walk with... The next best thing to being loving kindness=God is in my opinion loving others because it will give you a reward in heaven. Our intentions are what is the real thing in heaven. Ghandi's reward of peace was not what made it into heaven but Ghandi's peaceful unselfish intentions of internalized peace "God" in Ghandi is in my perception who Ghandi is in heaven.

A model of "God Stuff" male energy to me is the male model of the "Good Samaritan(a heathen), whose male energy encompassed what will make it into heaven... Men are most likely to become an engineer or build a road and even if it is often misguided energy the male energy is often given in the hope that their energy will help others while female energy is more often localized to those inside of a smaller familia sphere of influence. Wherver there is matriarchial energy the larger community of non-familia is often disregarded. It is funny that when I google to check how to spell matriarchial it asked me if I meant, "Did you mean: Patriarchal" In any case, "The Good Samaritan" [Good=God is but a larger version of that word =Yah] did not have the selfish female desire to help out only his offspring but rather "The Good Samatitan" used his male energy to help out a total stranger...because it was the right thing to do...and he did not just help him but the total package...restored the injured victim to good health with no expectaion of any compensation. This selfless energy to help others that are not from their own family often occurs from male energy but Mother Theresa and a nurses embody neither energy that often moves beyond male/female energy.

Mother Yheressa's acts of Loving Kindness for a larger human family for those not from of her own faith is that perfect example of "God" stuff. When I returned from my NDE, it became clear to me that killing Communists and Atheists for "God" was the exact opposite of who or what God= Loving Kindness was. God didn't only not hate Atheists and Communist, God loved them as much as God loved me. Returning from my NDE, I had no desire to kill anyone(misuse of male energy) and I felt a strong desire to help others. Helping others is like the currency of heaven. When we help others, God=Loving Kindness is reflected through us and whatever loving kindness we share with is "God" so in effect we become "God=Loving Kindness" just as Jesus does in sacred texts...

I believe Jesus did not respect his mother Mary or Mary Magdeline when they selfishly wanted to protect Jesus from harm but I can see the Jesus of my NDE modeling those moments when a woman washed his feet or a woman brought him a drink of water when he was thirsty as a model of "how to be." It may have had a selfish outcome as Mary Magdeline may have so impressed Jesus that he married Mary Magdeline but still the purest intention of helping a stranger is "God stuff." In any case, this is why we come to enter into a physical body...so that we learn "how to be" loving and kind to others even when our physical nature to be selfish and self centerd. It is beyond male and female energy where loving intentions reside but even though it is less pure than the perfect light of God=Loving Kindness" whatever we can do with our male or female energy to reflect Yah's love for every soul is better than being the playground bullie and brutally taking away the shiny red toy car from the little girl and shoving her to the ground. I don't know if Mary Magdeline and Jesus had children but if they did, I hope they were raising children like Mother Theressa and Ghandi...and perhaps they did...at least a reflection of that love continues to occur from time to time when children share on playgrounds everywhere...