Thanks to you all for your interpretations. Now I know what "peeps" means too. If guilt has served it's purpose, which it has, for me to help others, I will dump the guilt. There is so much perspective here that I never knew, this forum is a great support system.
I was raised a Roman Catholic. There are many good churches, but I have memories of the teachings of the wrath of God, and punishment, and the 10 commandments. So I can shed where all this guilt came from. Most churches today teach Gods Love, and his highest law, that is, Love thy God, and Love thy neighbor.

Life IS full of millions of brainwashings. Occasionally,even more often now, I turn off the tv, and meditate or do housework, with quietness, and clear the mind clutter. There is no stress or chaos.

I have read several of the near death experience links, however, the words that have most rang true for me are the ones found in ( My NDE dramatically changed my belief system) posting. Not only have I been questioning the reason for life since I was old enough to form this type of thinking, but it has caused many problems within my self that I continually could not make right. It has always been a mystery to me as to WHY I AM HERE. Each word I read from the above POST fits right in to the missing pieces of my lifetime puzzle. Not only do the pieces fit, they actually meld with my soul and have given me the sense of peace. Even slight as it may be it has added another demension to my one demensional world. All the bad that is constantly thown at us day in and day out through media such as newspapers and T.V. now seems such a small drip that it has very little importance if you look at the bigger picture that this post has given me. Everyone is in a hurry, to go where ... I don't know, to do what ... I don't know and to satisfy what ... I don't know because in the end all the hurry ends in one second of something and then on to the next hurried thing. Time seems to be the controlling factor in our lives but we spend so much of it hurrying around we never really have the time to enjoy it, then when we get older there is a lot of time but most of us can't enjoy it because the things we were hurrying to do in our youth are now pains in our old age. I once thought about something I had heard it goes like this:
When we are born we come in to this world with little hair, wrinkled skin, no teeth, very little sight, very little knowledge and end up in a diaper. When we leave this world there is not much difference then when we came in to it ... we leave with very little hair, few teeth or none at all, wrinkles, very little sight if not totally blind, we can't remember most of what happened in our life so we really have very little knowledge and most of us end up back in a diaper. If we could just slow down, remember each day and each thing that happened in each day and taken time to do something each day that made us feel really good, instead of everything being hurried, time would not matter much because we are not racing against it any longer we are working with it and enjoying it. It has been my observation that the reason most people are so frantic, stressed and totally lost in the world is becase of the pressures of TIME. Time is a restriction that we are placing on ourselves ... you have time to enjoy time if you don't do it now you will never have time.

I have always known that the power of two people, working together, for the same purpose has more power than one person working alone. Many things are based on the presence of more than one person: Brainstorming, Praying, Singing and even Eating ... to give quick examples. Having twenty people is better than having ten, having 50 people is better than having 20 etc. It is hard to explain what I am trying to say but in contrast to being one person doing the brainstorming or the praying or the singing or even the eating we all know one is a lonely number. It seems our strength is in numbers and if in fact we are all part of one being, which I truly believe, and if each of us is a speck of LOVE, then the more specks joined together the bigger and better LOVE is, this seems such an easy answer to all life's problems.

We all have our imperfections, each of us is saddled with things we must get through, however, I don't think we each should judge or be critical of others imperfections nor should be think anything other than how to help or improve each life we come in contact with. Personally I had chosen not to like people and instead put all my enegy in to loving animals. Animals do not judge anyone, they do not hate, they do not do evil things against you, they don't lie, cheat or steal, they always seek you out for love, they do not care how you look and they do not ask for anything more than love, they are what I call the perfect living being ... it is what I wish people could evolve to.
I believe in everything and anything that can be spoken, imagined or dreamed up as the thought process to get to these things was already pre-determined....

Maybe I am totally a wacko ... I don't think so but then again I could be dreaming ... smile.

I think I have...thank you ICOC_98...even here..in the curezone.
I have feltin these last several days. I have been a member of dozens of churches...I wore out two or three bibles but most christians leave their love in the pews... When I was in Mexico...now there I found the love that you are speaking of... I will return there some day...they have a wonderful support system of familiy and friends. When I do volunteer work, there is tons of love...I feel Yah's love pouring out in service of of love...It is odd to say it but the least religious people stand out to me as the most loving participants in volunteer work...but they have to go home... I am always seeking my spiritual family.... somehow..I think I am arriving...