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sexvictims
17 y
49,823
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Re: Any men falsely accused of rape ... Mom4More
12 y
35,144
MoreThis is a reply to # 2,066,875There are places, google men's rights. There are groups who work with men who are dealing with this.
- Re: Any men falsely accused of rape ... #192553
11 y
13,304
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This is a reply to # 2,089,285Thats my story but me and the girl was of age she was 1.5 years older than me now my life is f***ed up- Re: Any men falsely accused of rape ... #68716
11 y
13,443
This is a reply to # 2,225,343
To address each individual who has experienced the betrayal of such allegations, I offer my most sincere compassion - being falsely accused can create a lifetime of misery, as we often see in the news.
There is no simple or easy way to just "let it go" when someone commits such a grievous betrayal, and it takes time, effort, and a lot of discussion to sort it all out. Why do people do these types of things in the first place? The answer is that they do them simply because they can. If someone is willing to falsely accuse another human being of serious crimes, the accuser is 100% disordered and cannot be reasoned with.
I would strongly urge each person who has had such an experience to seek out a counseling therapist that specializes in trauma. I type this, frequently, because I believe that any trauma that is life-altering will either evlove into a personal definition, or be made into an event that happened, and is now in the past. The second outcome occurs very infrequently because it requires a tremendous amount of support, encouragement, and compassion from a network of other human beings, and most people just don't understand how far-reaching false allegations can reach.
Finding a counseling therapist that specializes in trauma might not be as simple as it reads when I type that suggestion. One might have to try out various counselors until they find one that is dedicated and mature in their counseling techniques and approaches. One of the indicators of a "mature" counselor would be someone who is practicing in a VERY small environment - either with another counselor, or in their own practice. Counseling therapists that are practicing in large agencies are typically over-worked, frustrated, and jumping through the hoops to simply get the experience necessary to begin their own practices.
So, bottom line: people are falsely accused of crimes, every day, and there is no way to stop disordered people from using/abusing the legal system to see to their own needs. There isn't. Family Courts are choked with absurd cases and outrageous claims.......so, accepting that this happens, regardless of why it does, is opening the door to recovery. Get help. Get help from whatever resources are available and do not allow the actions of a disordered human being to define who you are.
No, it's not easy or simple to manage such situations - I know from my own experiences how deeply false allegations can go.
- Re: Any men falsely accused of rape ... #68716
11 y
13,443
Bio Cleanse Detox Kit
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- Re: Any men falsely accused of rape ... #68716
11 y
25,156
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This is a reply to # 2,167,352I'm very sorry to read of your experiences, but there are a couple of things that need clarification, here.
1. You are cohabitating with the soon-to-be-ex-wife who is taking a host of prescribed and street drugs for what purpose?
2. You are sleeping in the same bed with this person that you are divorcing? Why?
3. Are there children involved in this mess?
The best suggestion that I can offer you is for you to get involved in some serious counseling therapy, hire a strong divorce attorney, hire a criminal defense attorney, and MOVE OUT. If there are children involved, file for full custody of them, unless you're using street drugs, as well.
This is not going to end well, even under the best of circumstances. The situation is a mess that is exacerbated by drug use/abuse, and sleeping in the same bed with the very person that you're separating/divorcing.
Best wishes to you on this difficult journey.
- Re: Any men falsely accused of rape ... dante2013
11 y
25,017
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This is a reply to # 2,167,404I was cohabitating and sleeping in same bed with a "barrier" between us. I was "allowed" some snuggle time each night with her and thought we were reconciling until this occurred, no children. In Colorado marijuana is legal and everything else was legitimately prescribed. I left for New Orleans to stay with a close friend. Don't know if I will ever go back. No restraining order served yet. I had no idea what was going on until she showed up with her friends and police in tow to get some things out of the house - expensive jewelry and my laptop. Next the detective called and she had done a rape kit at hospital. Of coarse they will find nothing and there were no signs of force like bruising.. I believe that she didn't know what happened but felt violated in some way and her attorney friend talked her into filing an assault charge (we don't get along)Advertisement
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- This happens....... #68716
11 y
25,003
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This is a reply to # 2,167,847.......all of the time, unfortunately. From what you've typed, she didn't discuss her concerns with you, at all, and just resorted to ending everything by involving the police and an accusation of rape. I am so, so sorry that this happened to you, particularly when you were led to believe that a reconciliation was on the horizon. EUGH........
So, as a doctor, you're aware that the drugs that she has been prescribed have a purpose - it may be helpful for you to examine the dynamics of the relationship, along with her patterns of behavior. Was there deception? Were there secrets being kept? Were there manipulations? What were HER symptoms, and what were your responses?
Like I typed, I would strongly recommend strong counseling therapy, hiring a very strong attorney, and finding out everything that you can about her allegations against you. You may not have a choice as to whether or not you return to CO. What about your clients/patients?! If you're practicing, do you believe that it's okay to abandon those obligations just to get away from a bad situation? I ask these questions simply because I've experienced my own legal issues and 2 divorces from 2 very different spouses that had the same intent: to harm.
Read back over some of my older posts - particularly from around 2 1/2 years ago. My CureZone blog, "Coping With Betrayal," and you may read some things that resonate.
Best wishes to you during this challenging time.
- This happens....... #68716
11 y
25,003
- Re: Any men falsely accused of rape ... dante2013
11 y
25,017
- Re: Any men falsely accused of rape ... #68716
11 y
22,195
This is a reply to # 2,182,014Advertisement
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”I was surprised by the effectiveness of it, and I wasn’t hungry.”
I'm sorry that this happened. Sadly, adults often view children as nothing more important than tools to control and/or manipulate. When people separate/divorce, it should be a criminal offense to include innocent children in the business of their adult parents. But, it isn't a crime, and the only way to approach this issue is to separate all emotions/feelings from the equation.
Having typed that, this does not suggest that you and your husband don't have feelings and emotions about this (and any other) situation, but those feelings and emotions need to be expressed in a safe, healthy manner FAR away from any/all children involved.
There is absolutely no way to predict what will happen, next, if anything. It may be that the whole matter has been resolved and is over, for the time being. Attempting to predict the "next move" will create undue anxiety. Talk to one another about the situation(s), but keep the children literally OUT of all discussions. They don't need to know about this kind of stuff, and they are not emotionally and physiologically able to process adult issues. They aren't.
Good luck to you, and you may wish to visit these sites that discuss "Gray Rock" and other methods to deal with these kinds of events:
www.180rue.com
www.familyarrested.com
- Re: Any men falsely accused of rape ... yvonnia69
11 y
22,223
- Re: Any men falsely accused of rape ... yvonnia69
11 y
22,223
Bio Cleanse Detox Kit
”I was surprised by the effectiveness of it, and I wasn’t hungry.”
in the uk if a man is convicted of getting a girl drunk and having sex with her it can be seen as rape. and is punishable by life in porison.
his accuser? is rewarded by a financial payment over £10,000
if an accusation is made (however spurious) that gives the police an obligation to search every aspect of your life and home.
to take your dna.
at interview you are arrested and confined in a cell (even if you asked to or arranged a voluntary interview) the place they do it is a holding cell not an interview room in a reasonable manner in a police station.
you will be put on bail for around 6 months while they 'investigate'
investigation meaning search for evidence to convict, not evidence to seek the truth (although rarely they might stumble on it they don't seek it')
they then use legislation introduced to counter Terrorism to monitor (counter to the guidelines of the act) our online communication and past communication).
The police have almost no choice but to forward your case to the crown prosection service (or they themselves will face investigation)
the CPS have guidance from the government that prosecution of such cases is ALWAYS in the interests of the public.
if the innocent man does kill himself from the unbearable fear and shame he is forced to endure and choses to kill himself rather than allow his children to hear lies about him in the press.
the girl will still get her pay out.
If she is found to have been lying (rare) she is unlikely to see jail time despite it carrying a severe sentence.
is a girl forces herself on a man (forces to penetrate) it is not rape!!!
if the girl then says SHE was the one assaulted, her crime is complete and her pay out on the way.
The assumption is that all men are pigs.
help to bring an end to this horror
NIL
seeking help.
Received a call from Police today asking me to come down and speak with a detective regarding an alleged sexual assault file against me. I am unsure if I should go to the police station by by myself or get a lawyer right away,
- Re: Any men falsely accused of rape ... #68716
9 y
5,797
This is a reply to # 2,332,250
Hire an attorney, regardless. ALWAYS have legal representation when facing criminal charges, especially if they are simply "alleged" and untrue.
Good luck to you
Bio Cleanse Detox Kit
”I was surprised by the effectiveness of it, and I wasn’t hungry.”
- Re: Any men falsely accused of rape ... #68716
9 y
5,487
This is a reply to # 2,339,274
I am SO sorry that your father is experiencing this horrible situation. He must, must, MUST have legal representation, particularly so that he may be released while awaiting trial. I don't know if you are in the U.S., but if your father is in the States, then he has a right to legal representation through court-appointed attorneys.
Once your father is released, he should never be left alone, again.
- Attorney, attorney, attorney...... #68716
9 y
5,448
This is a reply to # 2,340,925Advertisement
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”I was surprised by the effectiveness of it, and I wasn’t hungry.”
Having been accused and charged with domestic violence, I can only suggest that you hire a defense attorney, immediately. In fact, you should never have even been arraigned without an attorney present - this is a prioritized imperative. Whenever anyone is falsely accused, legal representation is vital, whether it's a civil or criminal matter.
Why anyone would do such a thing is not the business of the accused. There is no need to know why someone does this. What the focus should be is that someone DID make a dreadful false accusation, and treat the matter accordingly. If you need to, get to a counseling therapist, as well, so that you are able to safely and promptly process what you're experiencing. Heading into a legal matter in a state of agitation and anxiety isn't helpful. And, an attorney will have the ability to look into the background of the accuser - has she filed such charges in the past against someone else? What is her social life like? What is her credit history like? Does she have outstanding debts? Is she in legal trouble, herself? ETC............you don't have the ability to access this information. But, a defense attorney does, and it would be a wise option to retain one, immediately.
I am so sorry that this has happened to you, and I hope that this woman is debunked and faces some consequences for her actions. Brightest blessings to you.
