|
12/31/13: Love is hard, and so isn't change. 10 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
December 31, 2013
“When we love, we always strive to become better than we are. When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too.” ~ Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist
I am so excited about the party tonight. I have been feeling a bit off, of course, because of the gall bladder flush. Oh, that went really good.
I woke up around 3:00 a.m. And I had to go to the bathroom bad. So I went. I did something that I didn’t do last time I did a gallbladder flush, is use a strainer to see how many gallstones I had. I had this old metal one, that I never use, so ... read more 12/30/13: Change can only happen when you want it. 10 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
December 30, 2013
“They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself.”
~Andy Warhol, The Philosophy of Andy Warhol
I haven’t written in my life style blog in a long while. Which is probably a horrible thing since maybe if I kept up with it, maybe I could prevent a weight gain. Well, I know that I gain weight in the winter time (because I vegetate in the cold weather as I don’t heat my home as high as I would like it, so the only option is to crawl under the blankets in bed to converse my heat. Thus, a lack of major exercise in the wintertime. How ... read more 2/14/13: Love isn't encompassed into just one day. It is daily. 11 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
February 14, 2013
Day 3 of water fast
“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up.” ~ Neil Gaiman, The Sandman,
How do I feel today? Mentally and emotionally, I feel drained and hollow, but physically, I feel fine. Love is hard on the soul. It is hard on a soul that cares and has no way to stop caring unless one “kills” the feeling. It is how I feel today. I did something stupid when I woke up. I told D. “good morning” as well as Happy Vale ... read more 2/13/13: Reality is harsh and dreams are just dreams. 11 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
February 13, 2013
Day 2 of water fast
“Reality continues to ruin my life.” ~ Bill Watterson,
I regret a lot of things in my life. I regret being so responsible that I have missed out on having my own family and children. I have always been a hard worker, and always working to support myself, to the point that the reality of it all, as kind of ruined my life. I have had people tell me that men are intimated by a woman that is independent. I don’t know if that is true, but it feels like it. Why wouldn’t a man want a woman that can budget, pay her own bills, cook, clean, and still ... read more 2/12/13: Falling down doesn't extinguish hope. 11 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
February 12, 2013
Day 1 of water fast
“Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.” ~ Scott Adams
I am trying to look at life a bit differently even with my heartache. I know that the world will not end because my heart is broken. It just feels that way. I am hopeful, though. Why, am I hopeful? Maybe because D. has been talking to me more. We have been talking about farming, friendly environmental housing like Earthbag houses and buying land. It is a dream of his, as it has always been mine. It is lovely to have him talking to me about som ... read more 2/11/13: Emotions are harder to hide when raw 11 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
February 11, 2013
Day 4 of post water fast (refeeding)
How am I feeling. A bit horrible. I have too many emotions floating around. Today is a special day, as least for my mother and my Poppa. It is my 39th birthday today. How do I feel about that. I feel old, used, unwanted and kind of worthless. I honestly dislike celebrating my birthday, because in the past, it wasn’t much of a celebration, so I try to treat it like another day.
I know that isn’t how I should look at things, but to me, it is just another year of failure for me. I am still unmarried, and childless. I had hoped th ... read more 2/9/13 & 2/10/13: Learning something new is freedom 11 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
February 9, 2013 (Saturday)
Day 2 of post water fast (refeeding)
“Our wounds are often the openings into the best and most beautiful part of us.” ~David Richo
I am feeling much better, but still very emotional, as I was in full tilt with detoxification. I probably shouldn’t have stopped as I did, but it was getting hard to function at work, because I couldn’t keep my mind focused on the task at hand, because I was detoxing to hard. I tried to slow it down with juice, but it wasn’t helping much so, I decided to end the fast for now. I think in a couple days, I might pick it back up ... read more 2/8/13: Learning to be healthy is not a race. It is a choice. 11 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
February 8, 2013
Day 12 of water fast/Broke fast
“There is no dishonor in losing the race. There is only dishonor in not racing because you are afraid to lose.” ~ Garth Stein
I hadn’t planned on breaking my fast, but I did any way. On my daily office errands, I went to Krogers to get some more water, and a bit more V8 juice when I picked up some orange juice and some fruit smoothie. I got an Odwalla orange juice and a Mango Tango. I guess when I bought those I knew I was breaking my fast.
I didn’t officially break my fast until around 3 p.m. that afternoon, so I held off as lon ... read more 2/7/13: I struggle, but I have not quit yet. 11 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
February 7, 2013
Day 11 of water fast
“Pain is temporary. Quitting lasts forever.” ~ Lance Armstrong,
Honestly, I never liked Lance Armstrong much. I don’t know why. Maybe it was because he was riding on the hype of all his success. I was happy that he beat cancer, but it wasn’t that I didn’t like about him. There was just something very cocky about him that was a major turn off for me. Nevertheless, it is true, pain in only temporary. And I am feeling pretty nasty right now. I am not surprised, because I usually peak with detoxification around Day 11 to Day 15. Usually by Day 15 ... read more 2/6/13: Why is it harder to continue something then to start it? 11 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
February 6, 2013
Day 10 of water fast
“It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end.” ~Ernest Hemingway
I am still on my goal, but I have serious been trying to figure out how long I will go. Another week? Until February 23rd? I don’t know. My friend B., wants to meet me before a concert on February 28th. I honestly don’t know if I want to go to the concert, but I do love Muse.
Honestly, I don’t know what I am doing anymore. D. doesn’t talk to me, which leaves me feeling very lost and depressed. I finally last night before I wen ... read more 2/5/13: Love is hard and painful. So is fasting 11 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
February 5, 2013
Day 9 of water fast
“You must learn to let go. Release the stress. You were never in control anyway.” ~ Steve Maraboli
I am stressed out because I feel so horrible. Last night was like a nightmare, because I couldn’t get comfortable or warm. I sipped on the V8 and I was able to slow down my detox, enough that I got some much needed sleep, because I haven’t been sleeping too well.
D. hasn’t spoke to me in almost two days which doesn’t help with my stress. I also found out that my sister, B., is having problems with her husband again, which really makes me angry ... read more 2/4/13: Fasting shows strength, because it isn't an easy to do 11 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
February 4, 2013
Day 8 of water fast
“He who has overcome his fears will truly be free.” ~Aristotle
Ugh, this detoxing thing is hard and so very nasty. My night was very restless and my cats slept better then I did. I had to get up several times to used the bathroom, which in turn made me very cold aftewards. I just wonder how long I am going to do this.
Anyway, I have been trying to focus on little important things while on my water fast, especially re-feeding. I don’t know how long I will water fast (juice fast if it gets too hard to handle), but I want to make sure that I f ... read more 2/2/13 & 2/3/13: Motivation is hard when one is feeling ill 11 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
Saturday, February 2, 2013
Day 6 of water fast
“Freedom lies in being bold.” ~ Robert Frost
I like being bold, but it was hard being bold when I am detoxing so strongly. It hit me very hard around 8 p.m. on Friday. So much that I went to the grocery store and bought some V8 Juice to slip in order to slow down the detox. Now, I know that is a horrible thing to do, since it should be fresh from the juicer, but I had to do it for convenience. I didn’t drink a lot. Actually, I got a shot glass in order to control how much I was taken. A shot glass is one fluid ounce, so I was slippi ... read more 2/1/13: To love or not to love, that is the question. 11 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
February 1, 2013
Day 5 of water fast
“You may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one. I hope someday you’ll join us. And the world will live as one.” ~ John Lennon
I really am a dreamer at heart. I can’t lie if I say that I have a secret hope that D. might come around. I have been playing with the idea of maybe spending more time with him, to get him to see how he feels about it. I know that more time that passes and we don’t spend time together the more likely that he won’t find that little spark of “love”. Now, I might just be a dreamer, but I have never been one to give up ... read more 1/31/13: Why is life so hard if you live your life simply? 11 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
January 31, 2013
Day 4 of my water fast
*“Those who do not move, do not notice their chains.” ~ Rosa Luxemburg*
I guess I feel my chains a lot, because I try to move forward and making my life meaningful. If I stand around too much, I feel like my life is stagnating and I am not accomplishing anything with my life. It has been hard at times, because I do not have a typical life as most people my age. I am 38 years old (soon to be 39, which I dread). I have never been married (because I have never found anyone that really wanted to commitment) and I have no children (mostly becaus ... read more 1/30/13: Trying to understand the heart 11 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world.
January 30, 2013
“Fire tests gold, suffering tests brave men.” ~Lucius Annaeus Seneca
Day 3 of my water fast
How to I feel? Numb, forlorn and lost. I am still on my fast, and I don’t feel like eating at all. Last night was a very hard way to go. I put in the movie TRON, just so I would have some noise. And then proceeded to struggle with my heartache. Being alone and feeling alone is a hard thing to deal with. Most women my age have children and/or a significant other or husband to keep their minds going. I do not. My phone was silent and I had not heard from D. all day, regardles ... read more 1/29/13: Life is hard when you want to change it 11 y
My daily journey toward a healthier lifestyle, a happier life and finding peace in my own world
January 29, 2013
Day 2 of Water Fast
“Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.” ~ John Lennon
Today is my 2nd day of my water fast. I wasn’t planning on water fasting or fasting all day, but I decided to in order to jump start my lifestyle, which is actually about 29 days behind. I made several Year New’s resolutions which so far I have been able to keep. One of them is more of a yearly goal: lose 25 pounds and eat healthier. So, I am now currently working on it, as it is now or never.
Last year was a horrible year: I found out that I was pregnant ( ... read more |