You are a disgusting individual, and as I type this I am wondering if you don't get off on grossing people out. You should be ashamed of yourself. It is one thing to have a "fling" while you're married, but it is an entirely diffent story when you are allowing another man to control your marriage. If you have children you should ask yourself if you would like them to behave in the same depraved manner, and if you don't have children you should keep it that way. You have thoroughly upset me in that you should not be doing this to your husband. There would be nothing wrong with your relationship with this man if you weren't married, but given the fact that you indeed are married, you should have respect for your commitment to him. The only excuse would be that he beat you or something equally horrible, but if he's a kind an loving man, you should return his love, not betray it.