Re: my mom is out of control and i'm about to lose it too

Hey there

I totally understand what your going through. It is frustrating when you see poeple around you who seem to make no efforts whatsoever to sort their own heads out. It seems that you have been willing to exercise courage and determination to heal yourself of your past ills but your Mom just seems happy to wallow in it. I think ultimatley this is not your responsibility or even if it was there is nothing you can do to help until your Mom wants to help herself. From the sounds of it she is still in the 'the world owes me a living' stage and is content just to lean on others. Attempting suicide just before your wedding was incredibly selfish but then depressives are often self obsessed to an extent. Maybe you could gather some useful literature that you think would help you Mom and give it to her as a present. Then at least you have given herthe information and if she chooses to ignore it that is her choice. In the meantime just love her. Show her love and support but do not indulge her bad behaviour. Be honest with her about how you feel at the time. Otherwise you will hold a grudge. Dont treat her with kid gloves. Tell her the truth in a calm and compassionate way always asuring her that you love her and would do anything to help her - but first she has to summon some courage to help herself. It sounds like she has alot of issues but her addiction to meds needs to be addressed first and she needs to do it herself. Sounds like she needs a full body cleanse and alot of love. You can give love and not have to take someone elses sh*t at the same time though. Tough love is still love. I know exactly what you mean when you say that having your mother in your life makes you feel weak etc, I am exactly the same, I have never felt stronger emotionally than when I am not in contcat with my mother! Tweet