Re: narcissistic husband

I was watching for your post. Thank you for the follow-up.

The very fact that your kids have asked "Why is dad so mean?" (I assume that they have constantly asked that since they were kids), tells me that you should have gotten out a long time ago. No doubt, his behavior has left its mark on your kids. BTW, growing up, my siblings and I constantly asked our father, "What's wrong with mom? Why does she act like that?" We should have also asked my father (if we had the words and the knowledge) "Why do you enable her to act like that?"

Honestly, I don't see just how you can keep a circle of friends if one by one they drop you due to your husband's behavior. The bright side to this? --- You seem to attract people who can see through your husband, and that's a good thing. IMO, the only way to have friends and keep them is if you were to leave.

You talk about living your life differently if you stay with him. Again, that would be near impossible to do. Reading between the lines, it seems to me that the only reason you are considering staying with him is because you are unable to work. IMO, that's the wrong reason. As I pointed out to you in a previous post, you do have options. So...if you do stay with him, despite what you say, you ARE relying on him.

Again, it's your call. I'm sorry to hear that the counseling session didn't go well. I certainly hope you aren't going to waste any more time or money on that counselor! Too many people (even counselors) are easily snowed by narcissists. Plus the likelihood of a narcissist changing his/her stripes is just about nil.

If you are having a hard time building up the courage to strike out on your own, again, call the Domestic Abuse Hotline---they will help you get started.

Best of luck --- and I do hope you will opt for a fresh start!