For the love of, loss of and example of pets

Though I have long been a lover of pets and animals, I had forgotten just how beloved they can become and how devastating it can be to lose one.  Then, yesterday morning our beloved "found dog" Heidi had her young life terminated prematurely when she darted in front of a garbage truck just as the truck sped up.  Following is a post I made in our Yahoo forum for pets.  I am not sure how appropriate it is to post here in this manner, and cross post into the Pets support forum, but I hope that others find benefits and understanding, and I find that sharing my grief is helping the healing process - one that I never could have imagined being so painful.

Heidi, gone so soon but never to be forgotten

Life can often be a sea of joy.  At times it can also be an ocean or sorrow, and I am swimming in that ocean now.  Pets, as I have learned once again, can be such a bundle of joy in one's life.  As I have also learned once again, they will almost inevitably break your heart someday when they pass on.

It has been many, many years since I lost a beloved pet - all the way back to childhood in fact, when one was ran over by a car as I watched as a young boy and a second one who grew old and passed away during my teenage years.  My young heart was twice broken, but life went on.  I think you probably rebound more quickly from such things when you are young - or perhaps time has faded the memory of the pain I felt back then.

Now, once again I have suffered such a loss - and I have to tell you that I was completely unprepared for how devastating it would be to lose the precious baby girl who had become such a big part of our lives in such a short time.  And I also have to tell you that I have so very much more empathy now for those of you who have accepted a pet as a beloved family member and had your hearts broken from their passing.

Though barely a year old, our Heidi lived an adventure filled life of joy and and love from the day we rescued her from a likely dinner for the coyotes where she had been abandoned alongside the road in the hills of Southwest Texas.  Always the daredevil, the fastest and the leader of the pack, she died instantly (thankfully) during a typical moment of reckless abandon and joy.

I am not sure if an instant and painless death at a premature age is preferable to a passing after a long and lingering illness, but, though I will forever regret all the years I had hoped to share with Heidi, I am so very grateful that at least she did not suffer.

I know that life will once again move on, as it always does and as it must, and I will once again swim back to the top of that ocean and brush aside the tears and be able to look back more at the shared joy and cherished memories than the current pain of loss.  Someday we will find at least some closure, as I am partially finding by writing this (and I hope you will forgive me for carrying on so).  Perhaps someday life will even place another pet in our lives.  But not this day.  Somehow, right now I just cannot bear the thought of that, and I think some of you can likely understand how I feel at the moment.  I have twice now tried to shower and wash away my tears.  There just isn't enough water yet . . .

We buried Heidi in our beloved pasture where she had experienced so much of her boundless exhuberance and adventure, and we had often shared joyful times with her.

Do dogs have a spirit?  I once might have wondered about that.  But almost the moment I realized she was dead I just knew that I had to bury her in the pasture.  And Luella swears that as we pulled into the pasture she had the uncanny feeling of Heidi being in the backseat of the car wagging her tail.

I can believe it, just as now I believe that her spirit will forever roam in our beloved pasture, and just as her spirit surely will forever roam in our hearts.

All the best,

Tony

In response to that message, we received the following wonderful reply that I also want to share with everyone:

Sorry to hear about your loss. A friend just sent me this and I thought it summarized so much of what our dogs do for us.

A Dog's Purpose