Re: Reliving Everything

Some days have passed since your last post, so I sincerely hope you're doing better. After reading your original post, I want to give you a big hug!

First of all, I can tell from your posts that you are an old soul and an amazing person. Any woman would be SO lucky to have someone like you who places value in sex and doesn't just want to give it away to anyone. This is a rare and wonderful trait and you should NEVER be ashamed of that!

Unfortunately, you are surrounded by a bunch of twenty-something guys who tend to be extremely immature about all sex matters. Surely you are not alone in feeling this way and I can guarantee some of your buddies would feel exactly the same way you do if something like this happened to them, but they're afraid to say it for fear of heckling, just like you.

As far as feeling powerless again this pathetic woman who hurt you so deeply, forgive yourself because it's only natural to feel that way. But next time you see her (hopefully you won't have to see her ever again), try to pity her. I know this sounds ass backward, but think how how sad a woman is when she has to take advantage of someone (possibly drugging them) who is in an altered state of mind just to gain sex/power or whatever void she was trying to fill. You are a Marine who has served your country and you have excellent values and morals. She is an ill, weak person who preys on people at their most vulnerable. She does not DESERVE to have such power over you.

Sorry about the long post, but I just so desperately hope you can heal from this. Anyhow, all you can do at this point is forgive yourself and stop beating yourself up. No amount of drinking you did that night is call for unwanted sexual advances whether she was a coyote ugly or Heidi Klum. Time will help fade the memories, but unfortunately you'll probably never forget it. This is okay and eventually you'll be able to accept that too.

Wrapping up, just know that there is absolutely nothing wrong with you and you have the support of all the people on this board. Remind yourself everyday how amazing you are! Also, keep reaching out for professional help. Hugs and prayers of comfort!

-Amy- Tweet