when evil is in the eye of the beholder

Thanks for the support. I was starting to get frustrated with this thread.

I reject abuse under every form, but I do not like the neurotic frenzy that can -and does- get to the point of planting ideas in other people's heads ( esp. children).

It is true that there are many abusers out there. But being obsessed about this is insane. And this insanity can itself lead to more subtle form of abuse. I think about innocent fathers who might be accused of molesting their children just because they spank the monkey... And so on. Withdrawing such children from their parents "for their own sake" would indeed be a traumatic abuse. And the well-minded, zealant people are themselves guilty of many of such events.

I have heard of many a case of people whose children are taken away because of unfounded suspicions. These are horror stories as much as the "true" abuse stories they intend to prevent and fight.

Just after marrying my husband 6 years ago, he once happened to him to slap my face during a fight. Does this make an abuser out of him? It doesn't. And it never did happen again. Had I left him, labeling him as an evil and violent guy, would I have been considerate? I don't think so.
Again, an inappropriate scolding or an unwanted spanking from a loving parent, followed by an honest apology, is not abuse.

Normal relationships between human beings include the possibility of error and reparation, which are handled in a loving context of acceptance and forgiveness. Sadly, I see that these are concepts that many people fail to grasp.


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