Excerpt from the example 13 book "The Astonishing Power Of Emotions"

If you could establish a less serious, more playful approach to your relationships - not trying to make each of them "the one I am looking for", but instead saying, this is "someone with whom I am having the pleasure of sharing a meal", or "someone with whom I am enjoying a conversation", or "someone I am having a good time with today" - then you wouldn't use this moment in time as your excuse to defy your own intentions and desires, and the Universe would more easily and quickly provide the rendezvous you are looking for ... When you trust the Laws of the Universe and the fluid, life-giving, productive Stream of Life, you will find everything you are looking for. But in your belief that you must make it happen through action, you often hold yourself crossways of the Current, and you hold yourself apart from your own expansive desires.

When you are truly lighthearted about people you spend time with, you will attract other like-minded, lighthearted people. But if you are seriously scrutinizing all of them to see if they are your dream mate, you will attract other scrutinizers, and you will continue to disappoint each other.

When you bring yourself to a good-feeling attitude about meeting people, and you are looking forward to going out on a date for the sake of the fun or pleasure you will have today rather than trying to parlay it into a lifetime relationship, you will be much more likely to remain a Vibrational Match to what you really want in a relationship, and then the Universe will more quickly bring your perfect mate.

When you feel tense and worried about finding someone, or when you are worried about a person wanting you while you do not feel the same way, you are pointed in the opposite direction of what you are looking for, and you are a Vibrational Match to the very thing you do not want - and so, the very thing you do not want continues to be your experience.